Hung by chains

5. Notes

TW: Grief with regret talk

Solace sank to the floor, shaking uncontrollably. She hugged her knees to her chest and rocked back and forth to try to soothe herself. Quiet sobs left her lungs as she realized that these were going to be far from the best three years of her life. She felt her heart heavy and her breath quick, cold sweat ran down her forehead, and a fuzzy yet painful knot formed in her throat. She didn't scream, nor cry out for help, knowing it wouldn't aid her in any way. Even if her face twisted into a grimace, her jaw did not move, and not a single noise left her. All the screams, cries, and despair crashed into her throat without escape.

That was horrifying.

Why did she choose to go? It was only a stupid diary, nothing actually made her go... Solace had only herself to blame, if anyone.

Or maybe her father, who even suggested going to the Sutton manor via his will in the first place.

He had always been a mysterious man, never telling Solace about the work he did at the church, but she never questioned it, even as a child...

...And maybe that is what led him to wanting her to change her ways: she was too unconcerned for what others did, felt, or wanted. She never asked to know anything about anyone else. She believed that others would open up on their own if needed.

Maybe her father thought she didn't care, maybe he thought she wouldn't want to know.

But in reality, she would've hated to appear invasive

She wanted to know more about him.

She cared so much.

She couldn't make up for the lost time. She couldn't have another single moment with him.

Oh did she want her dad back.

"Pops..!" She mumbled among sobs.

"I'm so sorry... What should I do now..?"

Solace looked at the ceiling. Her watery eyes were dripping. Every tear held immense sadness. She felt a piece of her heart die with every drop, a void that only turned every happy memory into a new sorrowful one. Perhaps that's why she wanted to find out more about Meredith: to get to know someone in a way as intimate and close as reading their thoughts, their likes, their memories...

She wanted to make up for what she lacked.

She wanted to start overcoming her fear to never lose precious time with anyone ever again.

In the dark, she pleaded:

"Dad..."

...

"I love you..."

Unbeknownst to her, someone observed the entire scene. Their heart was crushed by the rough and violent hands of frustration.

How could they turn a blind eye to people's feelings in such a way? Not only that, but causing them harm in the first place?

A small slip of yellowed paper was then slipped into her room by the window frame, a message was scribbled in black ink:

Meet me at the garden's glasshouse; there's something you must know.

Just know that I want to help

~ E.S.

...................................................................................

(No one was hurt in the making of this chapter... Except maybe me emotionally)