My Diary of Sweet Nothings

A man like me

 A tribute,

So, this is a little R -rated, please do read it though but if you don't want to, its alright. I just wanted to pay my respect to what we call- call girls and call boys. They are as much a human as us and they are as much inclined to fall in love as us. We generally get so disgusted when the name of escorts come out, no self-respect, whore etc ..these are the words which gets tagged along with them. But I respect them. I think we all should!

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                   Should I tell her?...should I not? , These are the thoughts swimming around my mind as I wear my faded jeans. I take out a black jumper from the little pile of clothes that I have and put it on. I run my  fingers through my auburn hair to settle it down as I wait for her in the bedroom of a cheap motel. From the last couple of days this has been our usual spot. Mary, thats her name. She always follows the same routine catches a bus at the downtown abbey at 5 in the evening and comes here. We make love, except she prefers another word. After paying me she would run off to her normal life leaving me in the loneliness of these off-white sheets and my instant comapanion becomes booze. After all how do I tell someone who pays me to make love with her that I actually am in love with her? 

    ......Lying in a bedroom

          Lighting up a Benson

          Face hair is growing

          So I cut with a vengeance

          Hey, did I mention

          As she makes an entrance

          Said I had a tendency

          To finish off a sentence......

           I hear a click on the door and as I turn around its her. A smile crosses my face. She  appears wearing a maroon shirt and straight cut jeans with her hair tied with an elastic band. She never tries to look attractive for me. No doubt she is beautiful but the fact that she never tries hurts. I don't blame her. In her mind I am just this guy she uses for sex, no strings attached. I wish I felt the same. But its never the same, never can be the same I am too much in love with her. She doesn't say a word before opening her clothes and minutes pass by as we make love.

     .....Oh well, she's a local girl

         No make-up

         Cos she knows me well

         Hair tied up in elastic band

         With a kiss on the cheek

         For her one-night man.....

       As we close in she separates from me. She stares at the ceiling and I stare at her. She is beautiful. I wish she would look at me. I wish she would lie in my arms and then I could live in peace. But wishes are wishes. They don't come true for a man like me. 

   She quickly gets up while I am still deep in her thoughts. She throws the clothes on her body and wraps the elastic band around her hair the same way that she did before. I lie on the bed head over my hands starring at her moves when she utters for the first time that evening, 

"Do you want to eat?"

    Five simple words were enough to make me happy for atleast a lifetime. I nodded and stood up to wear my clothes. I sweep away the hair falling over my eyes and lead her the way out of the motel. We come to Kingscross bridge and as we cross the bridge we talk. And thats the first time we have a real conversation. We soon reach a joint and still no money in my pocket I am too shy to ask her for anything. But she knows me too well more than I expected. Maybe our minds never met but surely our bodies did and that seemed enough. She flicked her multi-coloured scarf over her shoulders and ordered something. We took a seat near the window overlooking the seaside. We sat there and we talked, talked for what seemed like ages. 

    ......Is it fast food

          I'll regret it after

          And I needed money

          But I'm too shy to ask her

          So she buys me chips and cheese

          And I tell her I love her

          And she's all I need......

         My thoughts are clouded right when I had no hope a light seems to appear. I like her I love her I wish she would understand how much I want to be more than a one night stand. 

    ......Tell her that I love her

          Tell her that I need her

          Tell her that she's more

          Than one-night stand

          Tell her that she turns my cheeks

          The colour of my hair

          All I wanna do is be near......

       Maybe I will tell her someday that I love her, that I want to marry her and that I want to be more than a one-night stand. 

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Hey Guys, 

       Please do leave your comments. I will really appreciate it. I really feel for these people. I think they are more than the word hooker, they are like us they are people. Thanks for reading this.

Much love,

Bharbi xXx