COMPLETED | Take Me Down The Rabbit Hole (BDSM | 18+)

XXXIV

"Merry Christmas," Alan said softly, instead of his usual gruff "Good morning," and Aspen looked at his friend-turned-dominant, frozen in place at the change of demeanor.
"Merry Christmas, Sir," he finally returned, pulling the strings of his morning robe tighter before securing the knot again. "You're in a cheerful mood today," he added carefully, fighting with his slippers before he followed Alan to their dining- and kitchen table.
"I enjoy the holidays," Alan said curtly, by way of explanation, and gestured into the rest of the living space that had done up before them - and in the middle of it: Spencer, wearing a classic red plaid pajama set, a string of golden tinsel wrapped artfully around his shoulders like a cheap plastic boa. "Merry Christmas!" he bellowed at the sight of Aspen.
"Merry Christmas, Spencer," Aspen parrots back automatically, gratefully accepting the mug of steaming hot black coffee that Alan was offering him. "It's so cozy here," he observed, "and it's so nice to see both of you in the holiday spirit."
"Do you not enjoy the holidays?" Alan asked promptly, sliding into a seat next to Aspen as he watched Spencer walk circles around the giant Christmas tree, ornaments in hand.
"I do," Aspen conceded quickly. "I think. Sometimes, it's just not very merry," he added, busying himself with his coffee once again. He knew Alan was about to ask why, so he took a huge gulp of the liquid and then said, hastily, "People just always put so much effort into everything around it, but then, things go wrong, people argue and-" he stopped short at the sight of Alan's face.
"Things are beginning to make sense," Alan said, somewhat drily, and reached out, holding Aspen's hand.
"Things?" Aspen echoed.
Alan hummed. "There's some mild childhood trauma unearthing there, isn't it? Aren't you planning on going home to Rochester for the holidays?"
Rochester.
Home.
Aspen shuddered, holding on to his coffee cup for dear life. "I- Yeah."
Alan hummed again. "Eat your breakfast," he then commanded, as if that would solve Aspen's problems.

A stack of five pancakes with syrup and butter and a croissant with jam later, Alan cleared his throat. "You can stay and celebrate with Spencer and me."
"I can't just cancel on my parents at the last minute- And what about Emma, and her kids?"
Alan gave him a side-eye. "What have I been teaching you for the past year and so, hm?" he demanded.
"Independence."
"What a textbook response, puppy. And what does that mean in this context?"
"That my parents don't get to dictate where I spend my holidays, even though they are my family."
Alan exhaled audibly. "If you really want to go home, I won't stop you. If you'd like to stay and celebrate here, you're more than welcome to," he said firmly. "But if you do stay, you'll have to acclimate to the Caulan Christmas spirit." With that, he lightly clapped Aspen on the shoulder and then went to get the stepladder for Spencer, who whisked over with another strand of tinsel. Before Aspen could protest, he found the tinsel around his neck like a scarf, and Spencer grinned at him. "Turn that frown upside down!"
"Aye, aye, Captain," Aspen agreed, giving a mock salute. "I like your pajamas."
Spencer flushed. "I got a set for you, but Alan said you weren't staying so I-"
"Oh."
Spencer's lips pulled into a taunt line. "Do you want to talk about it?" he offered.
"Yeah," Aspen said. "Well, my parents are still married, but they ... separated when I started High School. And I suppose I became a divorce lawyer because I think I'd rather have people split up in peace instead of the way my parents did. We're... wealthy, so it was important to them that they didn't get a divorce so they could keep up public appearances - and I suppose that somewhat includes pretending we're a happy family for the holidays. It makes things very hard, but they're-"
"Adamant?" Spencer finished, exhaling. "Damn, that sounds like a shit-show, my dude. I'm so sorry."
Aspen shrugged. "I know I don't look like the type of guy that carries around baggage like that, but-"
"Bullshit. We all have baggage. You already know mine, and I expect it'll only be a matter of time until you discover Thea's. Alan is... very private. But he has some, too." Spencer smiled. "Should I put on some Christmas music while you make your decision?" he suggested.
Aspen only nodded, and then, he reached across the table for the notepad and pen that Spencer used for grocery lists.
Going home for the holidays, he scribbled. Pros | Cons.

Unsurprisingly, by the time Aspen had listened to the first of many renditions of "All I Want For Christmas Is You", the list of cons had gotten much longer than the list of pros - and Alan had retreated to his office.
"I'm going to go make some calls," Aspen yelled over the music and then grabbed his phone from his room before he stepped out onto the balcony and pulled the door shut.

Cold wind whipped around him, and he felt as if the occassional snow flake landed on his morning robe as he dialed his sister's number with rigid fingers.
"Em," he blurted, as soon as she picked up. "Are you alone?"
"Hi- Yeah, what's up?"
Aspen stared out, into the vastness of New York City's skyline, savoring the moment of uncomfortable silence before he said, "I'm not flying home for Christmas."
On the other end of the line, his sister sighed out. "Neither am I."
"That settles that, then. Have you told mom and dad?"
"Yeah, duh. I got yelled at. Maybe just text them and then leave your phone in airplane mode over the next couple days," Emma said, her voice sounding bitter. "Oh- I have to go, Aspen. Merry Christmas."
The line went dead.
Aspen looked down at his phone for a few seconds and then returned to the living room, shutting out the cold air from the balcony.
"So, where are those pajamas?"