The Musician's Diaries

1, the first thing you remember noticing about me

~part one~

I strum the guitar, sat in front of the mic-stand, in front of a thousand eyes here. A moment of silence when we break a minute from singing and stare to the people that happily eyeing us. I held the mic.

"First and foremost, I have appreciated you guys for coming tonight, I, and the Luckies, decided to ask your time to hear our –your requested– story before and after the band. Ang kwentong minsan ko nang pinahalagahan, at masaya kaming alayan kayo ng kwento kung saan bumuo ng napaka-laking memories sa amin–at sa akin." A loud, wild and hoots of the people replied as I shut my eyes and smiled.

I've got something in my sleeves, and that is swearing to myself to the billions of people that loves stays, when it needed. Pero kung nakatadhanang hindi, bakit pa pipilitin?

Nanay once told me na hindi masamang unahin ang sarili, lalo na kung pwede na at handa na, unfortunately, pwede na is the right term but handa na? I think I'd rather making an essay about Social Sciences on the spot than be ready myself.

Lalo na kung usapang 'relationship'? Mainit sa mata ang salitang 'yan, sa laki pa naman ng angkan ko ay kanda-dapa sila sa balita kapag isa sa pamikya at naka-pag asawa o may manliligaw o nililigawan na.

Pamilya namin ang may maingay, malaki, malawak, hindi perpekto, pero mababait at ma-impluwensya sa baranggay.

Kung pagbabasehan, halos lahat ay extrovert, ambivert. Last time I checked, number one ako sa pinaka-tipid magsalita, 'yon ang sabi ni nanay sa mga kapit bahay, and its true, Law Stuffs can make you distance, quit to your last life with your family and be introverted.

Mabibilang lang ang salitang lalabas sa bibig ko kapag tatanungin o kakausapin, because there is no tomorrow in theirs, fortunately, nakakapag-review pa ako kapag may quizzes or exam sa amin.

"Alam mo ikaw? Kung hindi ka kikilos, walang mangyayari sa buhay mo," ang madalas sermon sa akin ni nanay.

"Tama siya ate, sumama ka na kasi!" Ang madaldal ko namang kapatid na sumunod sa akin, ang batang to fifteen lang kung makapagsalita akala mo may alam e. Palagi niya pang sinusulsulan si nanay kaya iyong silang lahat mas naniniwala sa bata.

Wala akong sama ng loob, dahil madalas nakikita ng tao kung paano ako ka bugnutin kaya wala masyadong nakikipagkaibigan.

Pero ang mga salitang "I can't, I have so much in my plate" o kaya "Kayo na lang" is enough ba para hindi ka pilitin sa isang malaking 'reunion'?

Adulting is really meant for me, for somebody out there who's experiencing the same situation as mine. But adulting could take you to the precious reality, where you able to teach yourself without the consent of your guardians, without expectations because you're on your own and handling it with care, they'll says something against but because you're open-minded, you obviously feel that the whole verb-agreement is not a good choice to manipulate whatever they want to show.

However, mukhang hindi nga. Para sa isang Law Student na katulad ko ay walang oras para sa isang reunion kung pwede namang christmas o new year iyon ganapin at hindi ngayong midterm namin...? Seryoso akong tao e, bahala sila dyan.

I have to focus badly, yet, I find it hard dahil ang gathering ng apat na pamilya namin ay dito magkikita kita sa bahay namin at diretso na lamang sa mismong place, kaya ang ending? Ang ingay. Ang daming bata sa doorway, ang hilig maghabulan, sa gabi nama'y magdamag na kantahan, inuman.