DEAR OOSUN

CHAPTER 3

let it hurt until it can't anymore. - LYAM RYAN

SUNOO'S POV

The visit to gallery really helped me heal that day and it kind of made me realized that I have been so unproductive these past few months.

There was a time when I used to wake up at 4 am to practice my vocal lessons, choreographies and I used to go to school and at evening I used to sit infront of piano for hours.

But it's been months I have not even look at the piano, music sheets and even at my language books. I stopped living after my sister's death.

But today felt like my sister sent me new wave of energy inside me, like she touched me through that art and made me forget all the pain and loss. I feel like I was born again.

Like as if she told me to live my dreams. For the first time after many months, I feel like doing something other than sitting all alone in dark.

I have given lots of auditions to debut as an idol in many companies last year. I even received many positive responses but I was unable to get back to them after she went. I used to ignored their emails and calls.

Now I feel like going back to my old self when I used to jump up and down after every good responses and I used to read them many times. Those were my source of strength. They made me able to go through long hours of dance practices.

After reminiscing my past, I opened my email account and tried replying to those emails and deep in my heart I knew that I lost my chance to be an idol because I was too late. But still I jotted my best response to all those pending emails.

And I went downstairs and started playing piano. My mom who was in kitchen came to look at me. She seems surprised and she sat there quietly in the corner listening to the melody.

She went back to kitchen and came back with bowl full of different fruits cut in small pieces and she gave me a side hug and held my head in her arms for long time and kissed me on my forehead. I noticed her welled up eyes but didn't say anything as I knew those were tears of joy.

I started getting back to my old schedule. Waking up at 4 am, doing vocal practices and instruments and hard choreographies during the day. I was getting better and seeing myself sweating made me feel productive and happy.

Last night before sleeping I went to check my emails without any hope but I was surprised to see good news from one company. I shouted and made a loud noise in my room and within minute I saw my parents at my door both worried and anxious.

I hugged my mom and then dad in excitement and they were shocked to see me expressing such gesture. They might have thought that I have gone mad as I have never been that close with my parents. It was our first close contact after years.

And I showed them the acceptance letter as a trainee in one of the biggest entertainment company of South Korea. I needed to stay with other twenty boys in a dorm for three months. There will be teacher for vocal lessons and dance as well. We need to practice day and night under their supervision.

The letter said we will have weekly evaluation and only seven finalist will be given a chance to perform infront of higher authorities of company.

From that performance only two boys will get a chance to debut as an idol.

They showed mixed emotions. My mom was happy but dad was not ok with my decision but he seems scared to express his opinions as I finally came out of my dark phase and he don't want to put me through it again.

'' I am not saying that it's not meant for you Sun, but you know that idol life is too hard and I don't wanna lose you again, '' dad stated very clearly and mom seems to agree with dad.