One Shots || Wrestler edition || CLOSED

Inner conflicts - Roman Reigns

I knew I shouldn't be feeling like this. I shouldn't be looking at someone else when I already had a relationship. Apparently my heart did not get that memo though.

I was in constant inner conflict. 

One one hand there was my boyfriend, Nick. I had been with him for a few years now and we knew each other through and through. I love him, I wouldn't be with him if I didn't and its not like our relationship was bad by any means. On the contrary actually, he was attentive, loyal and we rarely had arguments, let alone fights.

On the other hand though there was the man that made my heart race like crazy, Joe. He had the power to knock me off my feet with just a single smile, to freeze me in place with just a look. Every time he is near I feel like my world is crashing down around me and I really wouldn't care if it actually was. He was completely stuck in my head even though those feelings had only surfaced in the last few months.

If I was completely being honest with myself, which I didn't  really dare to be, my relationship with Nick, even though stable and good, has started to feel too comfortable, too easy. There was no challenge, nothing new we learned about each other anymore. It had become boring and stale.

I know I should probably leave him, especially considering my feelings but it was hard. I still loved him deeply even though the passion had faded. I didn't want to hurt him because he still meant a lot to me. Sometimes I wish he would have cheated or done something else to hurt me cause at least then leaving would be easy. But, he wasn't like that, he was loyal to a fault and had a kind heart incapable of purposefully hurting anyone. 

Leaving him would not only hurt him but it would shatter my own heart a bit as well. 

And if that wasn't enough, there was another problem. One that lied with Joe.

His views on dating and relationships had been jaded ever since he had a bad split with his ex wife. Everyone knew that because he had never made that a secret. Everyone knew that Joe didn't want commitments anymore, he didn't want to waste his time on relationships that might not last. Especially because the main focus in his life were his children.

Even if he hadn't said it out loud though, everyone knew that the main reason of him not wanting another relationship was that his ex didn't just shatter his heart, she pulverized it with how much she had hurt him. It was the fear of being hurt that much ever again that made him avoid dating.

So not only would I hurt Nick if I left him, me and Joe becoming a thing was highly improbable. Not to mention we all still had to work together in the end. So was it even really worth the risk all things considered? 

I got shaken out of my thoughts by nick placing his hand on my shoulder "You alright beautiful?"

"Oh.. yeah I'm fine, just caught up in my thoughts. Sorry." I told him, making my mind come back to the present.

"You do that a lot lately." Nick pointed out. "Maybe we should go back to the hotel early tonight?"

"Yeah." I nodded. "Maybe that's a good idea."

On the way to the hotel I couldn't help but notice how much Nick was fidgeting, he seemed nervous even. I would have asked about it if it wasn't for it making me nervous as well. Was he planning something?

Luckily I didn't have to wait long at all as Nick spoke up before we even got to the hotel. But what he said, was not at all what I had been expecting.

"I think we should break up." 

"Wait, what?" I asked as I looked at him in shock.

"I think we should break up." He repeated. "I can see you're unhappy. I love you too much to do that to you beautiful."

"Nick.." I started although I wasn't sure what to say.

"It's okay." He stopped me from saying anything. "You cant help who you fall for. I get it."

At this point we had pulled up at the hotel. All I could do was lean over to hug him tightly. "I love you so much Nick. I always will."

"I know sweetheart. I love you too. You just love me in a different way though. I see the way you look at Joe when you think no one is watching, you love him now." He said as he hugged me back. "No matter what though, you will always have a friend in me. I will always be in your corner beautiful."

"Thanks Nick." I appreciated that more than he knew, to know that I would not lose his friendship.

"Now, as far as Joe goes. Try being his friend first." Nick started after we pulled away from the hug. "Eventually he will come to know what an amazing friend you are and he'd be a fool to not love you after that. Trust me."

I took his advise to heart, getting to know Joe just as a friend as the weeks passed after my break up with Nick.

It was easier than I had originally thought, just being his friend, and knowing him as a friend only made my feelings for him stronger.

"Nice promo earlier." I smiled at Joe as I sat down at his table in catering. "Anything else on the program?"

He had done the opening promo for the show and usually if that was all he had to do he would have headed back to the hotel by now.

"Thanks Babygirl." Joe smiled back. "And nope, I'm all done."

"What are you still doing here then? Shouldn't you be out of here?" I chuckled amused.

"Can't I stay around to watch my friends?" Joe asked in an equally amused tone.

"Sure it's just that you usually don't." I pointed out. "So, what is really keeping you here?"

"Okay you caught me." Joe admitted. "I was waiting for you actually."

"You were?" I asked confused.

"Yeah. Mind if we talk in private?"

"Sure." I nodded as I got up.

We made our way to his locker room in silence. It wasn't an uncomfortable one though.

"Okay so what's up?" I asked him as soon as we got inside.

"Well, I have a bit of a problem I hoped you could help me with." He explained.

"Of course, anything you need." I agreed immediately. "What's the problem?"

Instead of answering like I expected, I was suddenly pulled into his chest as he planted his lips on mine. It took a second before I realized what was happening but as soon as I did I relaxed into his kiss.

"You are my problem Babygirl." Joe sighed as he broke the kiss too soon for my liking. "I can't seem to get you out of my head. I've tried but you seem to be stuck there. I have been in constant inner conflict over it because I know you're probably still getting over your split with Nick and I'm not even sure I'm completely over my ex but I don't want to fight my feelings for you anymore either."

I shut him up with another kiss. "I love Nick as a friend, I fell out of love with him like that even before we split. And you wouldn't be kissing me if you weren't at least starting to get over her. Now maybe you shouldn't try getting me out of your head considering you're stuck in mine as well."

Life has no guarantees. You cant help who you end up falling for. I knew now that sometimes all you can do is trust your gut and hope everything works out. Sometimes it will, sometimes it wont. But I was glad that this time at least, it did.