They Say We're Insane

Chapter 3

 

OLI’S POV

            I sat alone as always, poking numbly at my food. I felt weird. I was sitting at a new table, trying my best to become comfortable, but it wasn’t working. Since I’d arrived at the hospital I’d sat at the same table near the wall. My new seat didn’t suit me at all. It was too close to the window, making the already bright light blinding. That being said, I had no interest in returning to my original seat. The new boy, Eddie, was still there, and I didn’t want to make him move. I wanted to watch him. I wasn’t sure why, but he interested me. The way he sat and acted was much different from the others here. It’s not like he ate with his feet or screamed at everyone he met. No, his strange behaviors were very subtle, and for the most part went unnoticed by the others. However, when someone did notice a strange habit they really noticed it. For example, Eddie had the tendency to get startled really easily. In the hospital, I’d noticed a lot of people with that reaction. It didn’t pay much attention to it at first. However, I soon noticed that somebody could drop their fork or spill a drink on the opposite side of the room and Eddie would jolt and apologize. Even if there were no one to reply, he’d still apologize. 

            Most people just walked past him, and never noticed. However, there were a couple of kids, I think one of their names was Diana, who began to purposefully drop things and scare him. Whenever he’d jolt or apologize under his breath, they’d laugh. I could tell Eddie heard them, but he never did anything. In fact, sometimes he’d smile or even laugh with them.

            “I’m sorry.” I saw him mouth the words across the room, as a small piece of foot hit his head. He didn’t even react when Diana and her friends began to snicker. Again a piece of food hit his head, and again he apologized. My heartbeat quickened, as he and one of Diana’s friends made eye contact. With their eyes locked, the boy flung a piece of food across the room to Eddie’s table. The piece was larger and ended up hitting Eddie right between the eyes. “Sorry.” I sighed innocently, wiping off the chunk of food from his face.

            “Freak.” The boy snickered, turning back to his table. Eddie gave them an innocent smile, eventually getting up to throw out his food. How could he just smile at them? I wondered, watching his leave the room. Doesn’t he know they’re being mean? For the rest of lunch I kept my eyes on Diana and her friends. They were odd people. Diana herself was very pretty and seemed as though she’d be in the popular crowd at school. She had thick blonde hair and dark brown eyes. She had a thin frame, which seemed to win the attention of the males here. I couldn’t figure out why she’d be in the hospital in the first place. She seemed so perfect, so happy. It was needless to say I envied her. I had since she first arrived. Then again, I envied nearly everyone I met. Everyone had something about them, it seemed, that made them perfect. Well, everyone but me. Oddly enough, even after what I’d witnessed, I even envied Eddie. He seemed so happy, and willing to go along with anything. I knew it was horrible of me, but I envied his ignorance.

            The rest of my day was pretty standard. I saw Dr. Casey, and talked about my progress so far. I didn’t understand why I had to go see her, especially since I already knew that I was making no progress. I didn’t need another person reminding me how flawed I was. “I noticed you weren’t at your normal table today at lunch.”

            “Yeah.” I replied monotone, distracted by my own thoughts.

            “Why is that?” She asked politely, pretending to be interested in what I thought.

            I just shook my head and shrugged. “It wasn’t my place to sit.” I replied honestly. I could tell she was disappointed. She’d been expecting me to say how I wanted variety or how I wanted to try to step outside my comfort zone, like they’d been recommending since I arrived. But no, it was none of that. I had no interest in stepping outside my comfort zone. But like I said, it wasn’t my place to sit. It was Eddie’s.

            After my session with Dr. Casey, I decided to take a walk. As I walked through the halls, I kept my headphones in. I’m not entirely sure why, but having my headphones in, and being able to decide what I heard made me feel in control. I felt as though I were in my own bubble where no one could hurt me. I felt safe, I suppose you’d say. More than once throughout my walk I’d passed Eddie’s room. Each time, I’d take a peak inside without him noticing. I must have roamed the halls for an hour, yet he never moved. Each time I’d walk past, he’d be sitting at his desk facing away from me. I really wanted to know what he was doing. Actually, there was a lot I wanted to know about him, the most important one being why he was in the hospital. He was odd, yes, but nothing so bad as to make him live here. I’d met a lot of people who seemed way worse than Eddie, but they still got to go home at night. Normally in order to stay over you had to have something really wrong with you, like me.

            I stood across the hall for a while, trying to think of something to say to him. No mater what I thought of, it never seemed right. He’ll probably hate me. He’s probably like everyone else and he’ll just make fun of me. I convinced myself, beginning to feel mortified that I’d even thought of the idea of talking to him. I’m just a freak. He has no reason to want to talk to me. I should just avoid the embarrassment and not say anything. Those thoughts spiraled through my mind, followed by others. I could feel my stomach clench and the will to flee became unbearable. I can’t talk to him. I’d been stupid to think I could even get close. But even with all those thoughts, I couldn’t stop myself from walking towards his door. I wanted to resist, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t turn back. I could feel my heart founding in my chest, as I neared the door. I could tell my hands were shaking, and for all I knew my whole body was. I just couldn’t stop myself.

            Suddenly, I stopped. I was at his open door frame. His back is still to me. All I have to do it turn around and this could all be over. Even with that thought, my shaking hand rose.

And then I knocked.

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Thanks for reading! Ima try to update again soon, because I've really been loking forward to the next chapter! I thinks it's gunna b one of my favorite scenes to write x3

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