Poetic Sensibility

40 - Eternal Bachelor

Keshav waited until after the session was over. It had been a week since they'd returned home and Sarah and Kabir had demanded a session that very weekend so they could hear all about the trip. Romi, being Romi, had black mailed him into coming because she believed he was the best at narrating travel stories. And well, he knew he'd earned the bragging rights for that one. One little anecdote about the trip, however, would not be narrated. That was to remain between him and Romi.

He went back to the day when she'd arrived in the room, seeming tired and happy and confused and sad, all at once. Romi. Yep. It was incredibly rare for her to show anything that remotely resembles emotion on her face. She rejoiced in silence and suffered in silence. For her face to have taken on this newfound eloquence was a matter not to be taken lightly. And he was right. It was pretty serious. Romi had it in. For a guy. Keshav was so glad he hadn't missed it.

Just a few years ago, Romi had joked about how the two of them were to the Eternal Bachelors. He was an Eternal Bachelor because he had far too much love for far too many women at one time and she because she hadn't believed that she could feel anything beyond a platonic friendship for another individual. Now, it seemed as if he was the last man standing. Was that going to be his status for the rest of his life? Did he want what Romi felt? And did he want what was obviously going on between Kabir and Sarah if their annoying coy looks were to go anything by? Maybe. Maybe not.

Romi was by far the most assertive person he knew. If she wanted something badly, she wouldn't shy away from asking for it. But seeing her... smitten. This was new. And he had Samay to thank for that. At first, Keshav had wondered what made Samay so special. Now, after about 2 hours of light poetry and heavy discussion, he could see it. That brooding look, the grumpy frown when someone disagreed with him, that general aura of knowledge around him, and, Keshav had to admit, his distinctive style of writing poetry. No wonder Romi had it in for him. They were these two people who could either be the best partners or the worst of enemies. There was no middle ground for these two kids.

And it wasn't just Samay, Keshav knew that too. It was the two of them together. If one had the questions, the other had the answers. One would theorise and the other would present facts. One would write and the other would read. And yet, they weren't exactly opposites. This wasn't a case of opposites attract. He knew that they were both skeptics. Both were stubborn as a mule. And both could be annoyingly inexpressive when they desired to be so. But that, he realised, was changing fast.

After their "talk" back in the room at Paris, Romi had straight away gone to find Samay.

"I'm not going to play mind games," she declared to Keshav.

"I never asked you to," Keshav replied.

"So I should tell him how I feel?" she asked, puzzled.

"Do you know how you feel?"

Romi thought about it for a moment. "No. I don't. This is... new."

Keshav grinned. "That is what you should tell him. How you feel about feeling this way. This 'new' thing that's happening to you. Tell him that."

"What do I do if it doesn't go down well?" she asked, fear written on her face.

"If it's your biological clock that's ticking, you can always have kids with me," Keshav grinned.

"Ew. Gross."

"Oh, come now!" Keshav defended. Was the idea of being with him really so bad? And then he realised it was Romi sitting before him. Of course it was a bad idea. It was atrocious. Unthinkable. Ew.

"I'm scared," she said. This, ladies and gentlemen, from the woman who taught about 50 kids who made Keshav want to pull his hair out.

"What's the worst that could happen? You'd be back to being an Eternal Bachelor."

That made her smile. "You're not pissed off about that, are you?" she asked.

"No. Now I can claim the title all by myself. And I can see you're stalling."

She sighed. "This is so not easy. I used to think it was and I kept pushing Sarah. But I totally get it now. I have newfound respect for her. Damn. It really is a day for firsts."

"You're horrible at introspection," Keshav said. Romi finally stood up, asking to be wished luck, which Keshav did, and went on to look for Samay.

It was then that Keshav began wondering if he really was Eternal Bachelor material. And it didn't matter if he was. What mattered, he decided, was whether he wanted to be one. While Romi sat there, he could see all kinds of things on her face. Confusion, indecision, grief, excitement. He wanted to relate to it and share it. Sadly, he couldn't. Most of all, he couldn't get that look of pure, unadulterated happiness on Romi's face once she returned out of his mind. That, he decided, was what he wanted.

This didn't mean he was going to pick and chose from all the options open to him. Neither did it mean that the next lady he decides to court would make him feel that way. But if there was one thing he was certain about, it was the fact that he would be open to it. To feeling that way. Your move, Life, Keshav thought. He remembered what he had said to Romi.

"What's the worst that could happen? You'd be back to being an Eternal Bachelor," he had said.

Well, guess what? She wasn't.