Michael's Story

Chapter 21

When Michael came back from the bathroom, Junie was gone. There was only one other place she could be; his bedroom: Michael slipped through the bedroom door, his sight aimed at the bulk of the black silhouette in the bed.

Another battle was going on, but this one was happening inside. He felt his grip tighten on the doorknob, his mind telling him to resist the need to get into bed with Junie. If only he'd had the guts to admit he was worried about their future.

Michael saw Junie throwing back the blankets and turning to look at him. Given that she had just seen him, he had no choice but to lie beside her. Yet his hand was stuck to the doorknob like lint on a shirt.

"It's weirder for you to stand there than for you to not come to lay down with me."

The words of an apology seemed to form in his mouth, but he stopped himself. He let go of the door knob instead. When Michael approached, Junie peeled back the sheets for him.

Michael got into bed, and Junie covered him with the comforter. Embarrassingly, they exchanged a short gaze. She was unsure whether he wanted to talk about what had occurred. Junie felt so uncomfortable that she turned her back on Michael.

Until Michael made things uncomfortable, everything was beautiful. The sex was so fulfilling to Junie that she felt guilty for loving it so much. Embarrassment was added to the mix, and the result was regret. She reasoned that Michael didn't feel the same way about her as he said he did.

Michael pulled in closer and put his arm around Junie. She felt his head resting on hers as he pecked her face. As he slid his hand beneath hers, their fingers interlaced.

"I gotta get used to this," Michael said.

"It's something I have to get used to, too." Junie responded.

"We live in two completely different worlds. Things are easier for you than they are for me."

"Not as easy as you think."

"But still different."

Junie turned to her other side to face Michael, "Is there something you want to say?"

Michael was slow to answer her. He had to carefully review his response to her before he spoke. Similarly to how Michael didn't want to hurt Junie's feelings, he also didn't want to hurt his own.

Taking in her beauty was like gazing at a work of art. He could stare into her eyes and forget everything else. Michael let his feelings take over, and he touched her face. He gently ran his fingers over her lips while staring at her intently.

"I like you, but," Michael paused, "I have a lot of things to figure out right now."

"So, that means..."

Michael was going to suggest to Junie that they created some space between them when he was suddenly silenced. After seeing the pain in Junie's eyes, he completely melted. Her expression conveyed a tale of pain and disappointment. The moment he let her down, he knew she would never come back.

"If you don't want to do this, tell me before I get in too deep." Junie pleaded.

Junie demanded 100 percent of his commitment. Her expectations were high even before they had met. Yet, her vulnerability lingered and ultimately dictated her choices.

The idea of being sought and loved by a guy she thought she deserved set up a fire in her. As her eyes landed on Michael, just one word jumbled in her mind: rare. She had looked everywhere but couldn't find anybody like him. As long as Michael chose her, Junie would always be with him.

Desperation seemed like the worst thing in the world to Junie. In the current moment, she tried to bury the anguish deep where the rest of her pinned-up emotions were laid to rest. But she couldn't let her guard down and admit how she felt while being threatened with rejection. So she lay there, waiting for Michael to give her all the excuses for why he couldn't be with her.

Junie was anxiously dying, but she didn't want to pressure him. In the end, Michael would have to make up his mind about whether he liked her. She would let him stare past her if she felt it would help him collect his thoughts.

Michael looked at Junie as if he had an answer for her but was still trying to put the words together. Finally, he scrunched his nose and turned away from her again. Junie predicted that Michael would say something she would rather not hear.

"I should... I think we should see how far this goes."

Michael's encouraging comment was like a boulder tossed into the river of Junie's heart, sending a wave of happiness to wash over her face.

*****

The sun arrived late, but the morning had come. Michael constantly double-checked his phone for the time. Finally, around 5 a.m., the overnight restrictions were no longer in place. In this case, the police were successful in capturing their suspect.

Based on what Julian told him, Eric was the one they were after. The way karma showed up against Eric caught Michael by surprise, but he was grateful for it. In addition to having Eric arrested, Trinity wanted to return the cash he had tucked away.

Michael refused to tell Pablo that he had recovered some of the money. He didn't want Pablo to think that this reduced the amount Pablo owed. Michael saw this as payment for the time Pablo had wasted and the trust he had betrayed.

Michael placed his head in his arm and gave all the challenges in his life, particularly Junie, careful consideration. Then, he shifted his head to the side and watched Junie sleep peacefully. It wasn't an ideal time, but Junie was definitely unique. Michael was conflicted between his feelings for Junie and his responsibility to continue his father's legacy. Yet if he let Junie go, they would find their way back to one other if they were meant to be.