This is my take on what if Anakin left the Order with Ahsoka. I own nothing except my own added characters and the plot line.
Anakin Skywalker couldn't stay with the jedi. Not after them betraying his sister and then promptly acting as if no harm h...
It's almost as if the Force is turning the world around me to dust. White noise fills the background, even as we land, and Soren is taken to the Chamber of Healing. Anakin and the Elder Sisters allowed me to follow, with the excuse that it would be a great learning opportunity thanks to my interest in healing tactics. They must have sensed that I needed to be with him. For what reason, I still don't know, but seeing him so silent, more so than usual, is painful.
It's strange really. He's mute and yet, the Force allows us to be in constant communication. There is always a flow of information between us. His Force signature a calm gray flecked with notes of light. A means of grounding the rest of us, a rock in the middle of an ocean. A feeling foreign until coming here. Now, the silence is what is deafening.
"Young Sister." Startled, I turn from my seat beside his sleeping form to see Kage Sirai watching. Although I respect her deeply, more so than Master Yoda, I am exhausted, too exhausted to think straight at least. Simply inclining my head, I turn back to Soren. "Baransu no Kage, I'm sorry for the disrespect. I-"
"There is nothing to apologize for. You have been through quite the ordeal; it is natural to be drained after such an experience. However, I sensed that something is troubling you. If I may, would you like to talk about it? Or shall I ask Brother Skywalker to speak with you?" I look up at her in confusion and surprise. Master Yoda always tried to help, but he didn't always act so accommodating. Not so much by his own doing, just by following the teachings of the Jedi Code. She smiles softly, and if she had eyes, I'm sure they would have crinkles at the edges like Skyguy does when he smiles.
"I just don't understand really. It's painful to see him so silent, and it's more than just because he saved my life. I know that we are friends, but even thinking about the fact that he did something like that, is painful. I hate feeling like this, helplessness. It was always like this when Anakin got hurt, or one of the clones in our battalion, or just about any Jedi. I know that it's silly, because when I was a commander, we never got to grieve or focus on just one person because there is always another battle or something going on that we needed to focus on.
I need to be helping out with Sidious, especially with the plan going south, but at the same time, I want to make sure that he is alright again. I just don't know what to do."
"As Force wielders, our relationships, whether familial, friends, or romantic, are a key element in our way of life. We have a deeper understanding of emotions through the Force, and close bonds are essential to survival. Without love and hope, we are nothing. Hope is the only driving power against fear, as long as we continue to have faith, the rest will follow. That is why we are so adamant that all are comfortable and free here. We are a family, just as I told you when you first arrived.
You are young in age, but much older in wisdom, understanding, and experience. You cannot change the past sister, but we can work towards a better future. Not just for the galaxy, but also for ourselves as individuals. Ask the Force, trust in it, and it will guide you. I cannot choose your life path for you, because you know yourself best. But know that none of what happened is your fault. You are not omnipotent, neither am I. Alright?"
I nod, taking in the information. It is strangely soothing and satisfying to hear, but it doesn't make it less difficult to process. For my entire padawanship, I have been a commander on the front lines more often than not. Any mistake more likely than not, caused a loss. One of the hardest things for me to realize is that I am not a soldier anymore.
"I know it is a difficult thing to do, adjusting to a way of life that is so different from your old one, but that is okay. Would you like me to send Brother Skywalker in with you?" Usually, the sight of my brother would be a welcome sight, but a pull for another person's company tells me otherwise. "Would it be too much to have Plo Koon come in here?" She nods before exiting, leaving me to my thoughts. For some reason, the Force told me to request the presence of Master Plo. I don't know why, but if I've learned anything, it is to trust the Force and my instincts.
The familiar signature of Plo approaches, alerting me of his presence. A wave of nostalgia, of childhood memories wash over me as I glance over at him. He looks the same as I remember, wearing the same Jedi robes and simplistic belt holding his lightsaber. The only difference is he looks older. Something very unusual for a Kel Dor.
"Little 'Soka." His voice is the same, carrying the same apologetic tone that he had after the trial. If it had been any shorter of a time span between the trial and now, I would've probably been upset over his use of my old nickname. Now though, it's only bittersweet. "Hello Plo, it's been a while." While our bond has significantly weakened since me and Anakin left, it hasn't disappeared completely. I have forgiven him, even if I never forget what happened. He was the only one on the Jedi Council who actually apologized after my ordeal. What's left pulses with sympathy, and regret, unusual for a jedi master.
"Out of all people, why did you request my company?" I glance back at Soren, my heart tightening a little at the circumstances. "The Force guided me to the decision. But, for what it's worth, I have forgiven you, even if I can never forget." A wave of relief, that is not my own, wafts its way through our fragile bond.
"Thank you, however I do not deserve it."
"I know that you and Obi-Wan cleaned up our belongings after we left, explained things to the men, and making sure that the 501st were combined with the 212th."
"It was the least I could do, after all that transpired."
"Thank you, for taking care of my sa'daars (brothers)." Silence fills the room, ending the short conversation. It is heavier than most silences, but a wave of calm has drifted over me. As if I needed this conversation for closure that I wasn't aware of. I needed to close that part of my life; it seems.
"You're welcome, Little 'Soka."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Aliara Sirai
Species: Miraluka
Age: 50
Rank: Current Baransu no Kage of the Grey Jedi Order
