to love too late

chapter 45 || love

Minho's POV

As soon as I saw the letters fall from her journal, I couldn't take it anymore. I had just seen her again after months of being away. While I didn't have a connection with her like how Newt did, I felt like I had lost family.

I picked up the envelope as I carefully opened it, trying my best to not rip the envelope in half.

"One"

"Two"

"Three" I said aloud, opening the letter. 

Dear Minho,

Oh Minho. You are possibly one of the craziest and dumbest people I've ever met. But you continue to light up a path for all of us. For having such a large attitude, you also have a large heart. 

You running up to me, the very first day I arrived in the Glade and calling me a 'She-Bean' still replays in my head almost everyday. 

I'm happy to know that if you're reading this, that means you're alive and we saved you from Wicked. 

You're one of the strongest people I know and your charisma is what I admire most about you, even if you are rude to me at times.

Never give up, and stay sarcastic and annoying. I'm so lucky to have met you.

Love Y/N

I laughed slightly at her little letter that she had written to me. While it was serious, she had her moments of putting in some small humor. 

Brenda's POV

I could barely bring myself to open Y/N's letter to me. It felt unreal. She could be alive, or on the brink of death, and here we are, sitting and sobbing to her notes. But, I knew she would want me to read whatever she still has to say. 

Dear Brenda,

My gorgeous, strong, fierce, girl. You've taught me many things in the times that I've spent with you. Like to never give up, and to continue fighting. 

I don't know where us Glader's would be without finding you and Jorge in your hideout. You've grown to be such a pretty and kind girl. 

I can't say enough about how much I admire you. 

But, I do have advice. Shoot your shot. Go for one of them. I see the way you look at some, and I know that deep under you have some sort of feelings for a certain someone. Don't hold back, you never know until you try.

Love Y/N

Thomas' POV

I watched as we all placed down our notes, taking in a moment of silence. 

"I'm gonna go hand Newt his letters" I said, as I stood up sighing.

"Yeah, I should check up on Y/N." Teresa said, getting up. 

We both headed on out. The Berg was about an hour away from landing in our hideout.

I walked into Newt's room, not even caring to knock. He looked to be passed out, but his eyes shot up immediately as I came in.

"It's just me" I said to the blond as I closed the door.

"Oh, hey Tommy" He said as his eyes shut again.

"Uhm, Y/N wrote us all a letter. I just thought I'd bring you yours" I said as I handed him the envelope and journal.

"What's the book for?" Newt asked.

"It's her journal. You might have a nice time reading it" I said, walking out.

Newt's POV

The book lay on the side of my cot as I debated whether or not I should open the letter. I wondered if she had gotten the chance to open mine before she got shot.

I gave up, opening the envelope as I unfolded the pages.

Dear Newt, 

I honestly don't know where to begin. I hope that you decided to take the Cure. I'm not worried about myself, even though I could possibly die on this mission with you all, but instead, I'm worried about you. I'm scared that you might get hurt, or that the Flare will eat you alive.

I don't want to add you to the list of names that we have lost. Chuck, Alby, Winston. They're engraved in my memory, especially their last looks before they died. I can't risk it being you as well.

Everyday, I repeat the boys names. All of the memories soon come flooding back to me. The only memories I have. I remember the first day in the Glade, where I woke up in the med-jack hut and saw you, sleeping. How you chased after me and body slammed me to the floor when I tried running out into the maze.

I know it was you that night in the Scorch. Our first night and after we escaped the Cranks in the mall, I knew it was you that hugged me close to their body as we all lay restless. 

And, every night and day that I've spent with you, you've continued to make sure I was safe. You always made sure I was near you and wasn't left behind. 

Newt, I want to thank you for being my friend. And I'm sorry I couldn't say this aloud to you, but I love you. I do love you, even if you don't love me the same. If you're reading this, I'm glad we had gotten you the Cure in time.

Love, Y/N

My eyes watered at the last couple of sentences. Y/N needed to be alive. I needed to see her, to talk to her, to hear her laugh. 

I wanted to just get off of this cot.

The door swung open quickly, revealing Minho.

"Hey, Newt" Minho said as he gave me a small smile.

"Hey Min" I replied weakly.

"The Berg just landed, I'm here to help you up"

"Oh right, okay" I said as I quickly sat up, my legs hanging over the edge of the bed.

Minho came over to the bed, grabbing my arm and hanging it over his shoulder.

"Okay, One, Two, Three" Minho said as he hoisted me upwards.

My legs wobbled underneath my weight as I began to rock back and forth, trying to gain my balance.

We walked through the Berg, all of it seemed familiar. The back of the Berg was open, the sun seeping through brightly

Our base looked just like how we had left it, everyone happy, the water washing up onto the shore.

Aris, Sonya, and Harriet ran to us quickly, greeting us with bright smiles. They dropped as they did a headcount of everyone here.

"Where's Y/N?" Sonya asked, speaking up first.

"She got shot" Thomas said blankly.

"Alright, well, Newt needs bed rest" Minho said. "Where exactly are the beds..."

Right, he wasn't here when we had set up base.

"I'll help you navigate" Harriet said as she grabbed onto my other arm, pulling it over her shoulder.

I hated their help. But I needed it. Hours earlier I had stabbed myself and now, all I wanted to do was rest.

They helped me into a hammock as my body began swinging in it slightly. Minho stayed while Harriet left.

"How are you feeling?" He asked.

"Fine" I replied simply.

"Y/N will be fine, don't worry. She's strong" Minho said as he looked down at me.

"Yeah, I know"

He left with a sigh, leaving me in the hammock. I couldn't stop thinking. I couldn't fall asleep. I needed to know if Y/N was okay. She had to be okay. Y/N risked her life for me.

published : february 13th, 2023

A/N : another year without a valentine smh. i hope you all enjoyed this chapter! thank you for all the reads!!