RYUJIN'S POV
It's so wrong to like your cousin. I mean, it should be normalized because I'm in love with her. She's everything I think about, cause of my sleepless nights, my daydreaming, and how I'm suddenly so excited to attend family events when I hate socializing.
What are you doing to me Yeji?
I know there's no chance she likes me back, I'm so awkward. I don't know how to start a conversation but when we had sleepovers in our teen days, we were the best of friends. She used to share what all happened in a day and how she does not like her history teacher in school.
We used to sneak into the kitchen to grab late-night snacks, and watch movies, only to wake up all cuddled up. She was my safe place. But then we grew up. We have our personal lives and space where neither she's involved in mine, nor am I involved in hers. But how I wish she knew everything about me.
I would only attend the events for her. Even if it was a millisecond of eye contact, I would be dying out of happiness.
Guess who's mad because I'm not giving them attention? My girlfriend! I know I shouldn't be talking about Yeji when I already have a girlfriend, but I just cannot stop thinking about her. My heart belongs to her. I started dating Jimin because is nice and she kept me company throughout my college. I started liking her and I was sure I feel something for her. But right now, she's being too much. I don't know if it's because I'm so obsessed with Yeji that everything Jimin does just gets to me.
I'm a bad girlfriend, she genuinely likes me and cares for me but, I just cannot stop thinking about Yeji. Every day, every night, every moment it's about Yeji. Even if I achieve something, I wish Yeji was there watching me reach my goals.
What's saddening is, that I and Yeji barely talk anymore. We are at a phase in life where we just need two friends and Sundays. Tired as hell, and when Jimin make plans, they involve usage of energy, I just need one day to rest but I guess I don't deserve it because I've not been paying attention to Jimin.
I'm not even treating her as my girlfriend, I'm really bad at this. I constantly hurt her because she keeps updating me about her day and I just don't know if I should do the same or not. She's the flowers, dates, and surprise-loving person and I haven't had any of these in a while.
But here I am, at her workplace, holding flowers because I don't want to be a bad girlfriend. And whatever I have for Yeji should be suppressed, because I don't even have the minimum chance of being with her. For Yeji, her career comes first, from work to home and from home to work. That's all she has ever done.
I walk inside the building and ask the receptionist if I can see Jimin, and she asks me to wait in the lobby. It's almost her finishing time, I think I can wait till she's done with her job for the day. After a few minutes, I see Karina walking out of the elevator with a few more people. She's talking to someone while she makes her way to the lobby. And as soon as she sees me, she smiles and fastens her pace to hug me.
"I needed to see you today. God, today was the worst, but you made it so much better"
"You are kind of squeezing the flowers" I laugh and she moves back. "I cannot kiss you here" She holds my wrist and drags me outside where my car is and not a second later she's already kissing the hell out of me. I know my description is not good but there's so much love she's pouring into the kiss.
