"I really didn't expect you to be this type of a doctor. I'm really disappointed" I said looking straight into his eyes. Even saying that I could hear my heartbreak. As much as I didn't want to say it, I felt like I had to.
A hospital in the middle...
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"What about you, how have you been?" he asked, and I froze. Shitty. that's the first word that came to my mind
"I'm fine," I said, then went back to massaging his shoulder.
"I saw you do the heart surgery earlier today," He said
"You were there?" I asked
"Yeah, I went to talk to Doctor Park. Before I came here," he said, "You did well. No panic attack this time."
I chuckled at his comment, "It was still nerve-racking."
"Is Ah-rang a new staff?" he asked.
"Yeah. she is nice," I said. "Lift your arm a bit," I said, and he did. I put my hand on the side of his chest and massaged it upwards towards his shoulder.
"you are good at massaging," he said, and his voice was lower than before. he seemed more relaxed
"Thanks. Does your shoulder feel stiff every night?" I asked
"Yeah, but it isn't as bad as it used to be," he said. "The massages help. it only gets really bad when I sleep in a wrong posture."
"Then sleeping on the sofa will make it worse, no?" I said
"It's fine."
"No, you should sleep on my bed," I said but froze because the way it came out wasn't what I meant. good thing he wasn't facing me because I could feel my face warm-up
"W-what?" He asked
"No, what I meant is you sleep on my bed, and I will sleep on the sofa. I don't mind. that way, your shoulder doesn't hurt," I explained.
"It's fine if it hurts, I will let you know," he replied. I decided not to push the conversation because it was awkward.
After a few minutes, I finished massaging his shoulder. With that, I told him good night and went to bed. But instead of sleeping, all I could think about was him. A part of me was happy that he was back, but at the same time, I didn't want to get hurt. I already know he doesn't feel anything towards me. But a part of me wanted to try again. What if he wants to. What if he changed his mind? All of these thoughts kept running over and over again in my head until, somehow, sleep took over me.
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