We sat in comfortable silence for a while, her head pressed against my chest and my fingers running through Leah's hair, trying to make her as comfortable as possible. A slight whimper leaving her body every now and then as the pain she was currently in, was taking over her. "I have endometriosis". She whispered, her words causing my chest to vibrate as her head was pressed against my chest. "Oh Le" I responded, holding her tighter than I ever had before. As I eventually managed to get her up from the floor, causing her as less pain as possible, I managed to guide her gently to bed. As I pulled the covers back and watched my girl carefully get in, I gave her a gentle kiss to her head and assured her I will be back shortly. "Charl no! please don't leave me." Our eyes locked onto contact and I saw the vulnerability in her eyes. This was a side to Leah I had never seen. I knelt next to the bed, my chin leaning on the bed as I looked at her, "I'm here and I'm not leaving, I'm just gonna go to the kitchen to get a few bits and I'll be back in 5 minutes." I assured her. Leah just gave me a weak nod of her head as she acknowledged the words which I had just said.
As I stood in the kitchen, I suddenly realised I had no idea about endometriosis. The girl I loved was suffering with a condition and I had no clue how I could help her or at least ease the pain she was in. As I waited for the kettle to boil, I scrambled in my pocket, pulling my phone out and decided to search about it to try and understand it a little bit more. As I scrolled through my phone reading the information on the NHS website, I heard the kettle whistle to indicate it was finally boiled. I put my phone back into my pocket and filled the hot water bottle. I opened to cupboard to the right, knowing this was where Leah kept her pain killers and took a sleeve of paracetamol with me and a bottle of water taken from the fridge.
When I returned to the bedroom, Leah was still in the same position in which I had left her. As she noticed my presence enter the room, her eyes once again locked on mine as she gave me fragile smile, the spark which I was so used to seeing from her crystal blue eyes had faded as the pain she was in had taken over her. I crept gently towards her side of the bed and passed her the hot water bottle. "Take these, they might ease your pain a bit" I whispered, handing her 2 paracetamol and the bottle of water. As she listened to my advice, I made my way to the other side of the bed, edging myself close beside Leah and pulling her into me, her body pressed against my chest as I ran my fingers through her hair. I gave her a gentle kiss to the crown of her head and continued running my fingers through her golden locks. I felt her breathing slow down as she was drawn into a deep sleep, the hot water held against her stomach, pressed against my right thigh, the heat radiating as it lay in between us.
I pulled my phone carefully back out of the pocket in my jumper, making sure I didn't stir too much as I wanted Leah to have as much sleep as possible. I continued scrolling through the NHS website. As I got further down the page, I came to the symptoms. My eyes scrolling through the list until I saw it. Pain during or after sex. My heart dropped. Had she been in pain this whole time when we pleasured each other, have I caused her to be in this much agony? My heart began to race as my mind was over run and my body full of guilt of the idea that I had made this situation worse. As I lay my phone on the bedside table I gently rolled onto my side, pulling Leah closer into me than before, my head resting on the pillow slightly above hers as I felt her slow breath against my chest. I closed my eyes and lay with the woman I loved.
I was suddenly awoken to Leah frantically jumping out of the bed, her eyes swiftly moving around the room as she was deep in thought. I looked up at her and softly said "Leah what's wrong? Come back to bed, you look exhausted." Her eyes fixated on mine as she struggled to find the words. "E-erm, I need to have a shower and clean myself." She managed. "You need to get up though, I need to change the bedsheets." Confused to as to why she decided now to change the bedding, my eyes followed Leah's as they reached the area where Leah was lay. I saw that her period had seeped through her pyjama bottoms, onto the bedsheet. I swiftly got out of bed and edged my way to Leah who remained stood in the same spot, a look of embarrassment crept across her face. "it's okay I assured her, we can sort this, come on, lets get you to the bathroom." Giving her a gentle kiss to her forehead I entered the bathroom and began to run her a bath.
Once full, I allowed Leah to enter the bath and continued to the bedroom to change the bed sheets. As I finished changing the bed sheet and duvet covers, I made my way to the bathroom. Leah was sat with her knees tucked under her chin as she laid her head. Her eyes appeared to be vacant as she seemed deep in thought. I cleared my throat, ensuring my presence was known, her eyes darted to me as I stood in the doorway. "I'm so sorry" she whispered. "I know you didn't sign up for this." My heart broke, the usual confident skipper was now vulnerable, a side to her I had never seen. "hey hey don't be silly" I responded in a calming tone, making my way towards the bath tub as her eyes gazed back up at mine. "Come here, let me help you".
I helped Leah wash her hair, pouring a jug of water to make sure her hair was completely clean. As she exited the bath and made her way to the bedroom, I handed her the fresh pair of pyjamas I had laid out for her which she changed into. Seeing Leah in this way broke my heart, but it made me fall deeper in love with her as I realised all I wanted to do was make sure she was comfortable and in as least amount as pain as possible. She sat at her dressing room table to dry her hair as I crept up behind her and gently took the hair dryer out of her hands, "Let me do it for you" I whispered kissing the top of her head.
As I finished drying her hair, I looked at Leah through the mirror, our eyes meeting as I gave her a gentle smile. "Come on, let's get back in bed, we can watch a movie." We settled back in bed, resuming the position we were in earlier. I had the remote as I endlessly scrolled through Netflix to find a film, I felt Leah lift her head from my chest as my eyes moved from the TV to her blue eyes. "I love you Charlotte, thank you for helping me, you didn't have to do that" "I love you too Le, and I'm always going to help you, it's me and you forever" I smiled back at her, pressing my lips against hers to assure her I wasn't going anywhere.
