Hold me tighter, pleaseꨄ

✘Chapter Thirty Eight✘

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⚠⚠❌TRIGGER WARNING⚠⚠❌
            (Abuse/self harm)

Sharp filed nails dugged themselves into ash blonde hair, pulling the strands as hard as possible pulling up the owner of the blonde hair.
Crimson eyes glared down at matching Ruby ones.
Katsuki's mother glare only sharpened noticing the tears that trailed down her so called son's face.

"You've grown weak."

"How do you expect me not to cry when your beating the shit out of me, you old hag."

The blonde immediately regretted his words, even before he received a few more blows because of them.

'You deserve this!'

'You've done so much harm to everyone around you, and your mother is the only one who's doing anything about it.'
'And even then she's being easy on you.'

B- 'She is? '

'Yeah.'
'She should be making you cough up blood if anything.'

B- Your right....

"Tsk your calling me weak?"
"I-I can bearly feel your blows!"

Mitsuki looked down at her son a confused look crossing her face but anger quickly replaced it.

"Ha!"
"Your just asking to get the shit knocked out of ya!"

"I was gonna take it easy on you but fine if that's how you want to be."

When Katsuki heard the distinct sound of a belt, he knew he definitely pissed her off.

'Good!'
'This is what you deserve!'
'If you start feeling numb tell her she's not hitting hard enough!'
'You deserve this!'

B- I deserve this....

                            -💥-

A few days passed and the blonde was finally getting to where he didn't have a slight limp when he walked.
He also hadn't seen Izuku since the hospital visit, even though they were sharing a room Bakugo once again was avoiding him.
He'd stay out of his room all day, made sure to ignore him during school hours all the way to not coming home till after midnight.
Mitsuki definitely helped keep him out, she hadn't actually beaten him since the first night.
Which was somewhat of a plus, he was able to heal a little.

Though at the moment the blonde was stressing over going to his new dads for dinner. They would definitely notice him not eating, and then......

'They'll send you back to that God forsake hospital!'

Yeah....
They'll lock him away again.

'They'll probably even realize your not even worth it, and just leave you there.'
'It's not like you don't deserve to be alone.'

katsuki finally looked up at himself, his reflection staring right back him.
Except he wasn't actually seeing the scrawny broken boy that existed in the shell of his body. Instead he was looking at middle school him.
When he was both confident and an ass-hole at the same time. When he told an Innocent greenette to kill himself, and that middle school reflection slowly morphed into some kinda of monster.

'You even look the part.'
'You should just cancel, claim to not be feeling well.'

'They probably don't want to be seeing you anyway.'

B-  Yeah..... You're probably right....

'I am right.'
'You should just stay here, and reflect maybe even punish yourself.'
'You'll be doing everyone a favor if you just sliced the monster away.'

B-  I don't even have anything....
And I'm not doing what I did at the hospital!
That shit smelled terribly!

'I'm sure you have scissors lying around somewhere. '
'What?'
'Not even gonna try to look?'
'Are you starting to think you actually don't deserve any of this?'
'That's laughable. '

The blonde wiped away the tears that had managed to fall, before walking out of the bathroom and grabbing his phone that was on his night stand.

'I can't make it, I'm sick.'
'Sorry :/'

After that message had been sent, Katsuki started to look for... well anything sharp honestly.
He was desperate.

Though the longer he spent looking the more he realized he really didn't have anything that would suffice.

'Check Izuku's side.'

B:    No!
     That's his shit!

'It doesn't matter, your only looking for something sharp!'
'What if he's hiding a knife away, and then he decides he deserves to be hurt?'
'He definitely doesn't deserve it!'
'Not like you!'

That very thought, the thought that Midoriya would ever harm himself on purpose scared Bakugo.
He felt his stomach jump out of his throat and he begun to hastly search around, knocking over a couple things by accident.
But he was to focus to even notice.

And then he saw it.
A little switch blade, right under the freckle teen's bed.

His heart was pounding in his ears, but all he could hear was that God forsaken voice.
Screaming at him to do it!
To take it!
To rip off his clothes and cut every inch of skin he can, till he's bleeding to death!

The blonde quickly made haste to the bathroom, locking it and pulling down his pants to where he was only in boxers.

His scars, still very much noticeable considering he had done this same things mere weeks ago.

'Cut over them!'
'Cut all around them!'
'It doesn't fucking matter just punish yourself!'

The blonde looked up at the bathroom door once more to make sure it was locked before opening up the blade.
His hand shaking uncontrollably, more tears falling and hitting the tile floors, and for a moment just a small second he wondered if he really deserved all this?
The beatings, his own little punishments.... was he really this bad of a person?
But his mind became foggy again and all he could hear was that unreasonable sadistic voice telling him to do it!
To cut!
He did deserve this!
For making everyone's life fucking miserable!
For being the reason why Izuku lost his memories!

Thus begun once slice after another.

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