The Boyz Anthology

Don't You Trust Me? - Lee Hyunjae

"It sucks that you had to work last night! We had a blast!"

The words an acquaintance of yours told you when you ran into each other at the coffee shop this morning played in your head all day. You had no idea what she had been referring to, and when you asked her to elaborate, you found yourself in a cascade of lies.

Apparently, your boyfriend has had many nights out without your knowledge. It was nearly a weekly thing for this group to get together and go out, and you'd never even heard about it until now. On accident. 

You scoff the more you think about it. Even worse, you've been invited to these nights out, but Hyunjae always made an excuse for you. You had plans or you were working. More like you didn't know anything about it. 

Why has he been hiding this from you? Why has he been lying to you and telling you he had to stay over at work on nights he was out partying? What game is he playing? You plan to find out the second he gets home, which should be any moment now.

Stewing in anger, you finally hear your boyfriend enter the apartment. You quietly sit on the couch as he greets you and moves through the kitchen. For a while, you watch him, wondering what is going on in his mind. He seems like his normal self, and the fact that he's been hiding something from you and acting normal the whole time sets you on edge. 

"I'm so exhausted," he says as he plops down next to you on the couch.

You hum. "I guess a long night of partying will do that to you."

Through the couch, you can feel his body freeze, but he plays it off well. He looks over at you with a confused expression, and it immediately pisses you off. "What do you mean?"

"Don't play dumb with me, Jaehyun," you harshly reply, making sure to use his birth name instead of his nickname. "I ran into Lia. She told me how sorry she was that I couldn't make it out last night."

The blood drains from his face once he realizes he's caught and your stomach turns. You're going to be sick.

"I can explain," he immediately says. "There were some nights that you really were busy, but the others… I don't know… I just enjoyed being out by myself and not having to worry about anyone else. I felt free."

His words hurt you and they do little to make you feel better. They also make you question your entire relationship. "Felt free? I didn't realize you felt trapped."

His eyes widen and he opens his mouth to refute your words, but you carry on before he can. The damage is already done. "Regardless, that's a horrible reason for you to continuously lie to me. Not to mention, how would you feel if I did something like this?"

A grimace crosses his face and you know how much he'd hate it. How much it'd hurt him. He'd be furious, just like you. "I'm sorry. I really am. I didn't mean for it to turn into this huge secret, and I wasn't thinking about the consequences if you ever found out…"

You stay silent, wondering where you even go from here. Hyunjae leans forward to capture your gaze. "Please, forgive me… I'll do whatever you want."

"I want you to list every lie you've ever told me. Then, I'll forgive you… Actually, then I'll consider forgiving you."

A hurt expression crosses his features. "Do you not trust me?"

Disgust hits you before any other emotion. "Hell no, I don't trust you. You've been lying to me for months. Consider it a miracle that I don't just break up with you instead."

You don't think Hyunjae truly thought about the ramifications of his actions. If you didn't find out, then he wasn't really hurting anybody and it wasn't a big deal.

Only it is. The lies. The deception. The fact that he wanted to feel "free". That worries you and makes you think that you're more invested in this relationship than he is. 

Maybe the two of you shouldn't be together. Maybe what you need to do is set Hyunjae free.