Break Bad

Not breaking, just entering....kinda?

June 30th, 4:20PM.

"Try Tylenol, mixed with ibuprofen and vodka."
Evan deadpanned while he wiped the parlour waiting chairs clean in the storage room with furniture polish. Keith rubbed his temples and the headache sent another flare of pain through his head.

"Vodka? Fucking vodka?"
Keith said through clenched teeth.

Evan laughed, loudly, and sat down in the office chair.
"Okay, maybe not that. But two Tylenol and two ibuprofen."

"Okay, just lower your goddamn voice!"
Keith hissed.

Keith stood, and opened the door into the parlour lobby, sitting at the desk, trying to endure the bright light. While Evan spun in the office chair in the storage room, talking the whole time.

"What's got your nuts in a twist Keithers?"

Keith sighed.
"What did I say about the nicknames?"

"Pfft. Fine. What hath gotten thine testiclés twisted, sire?"
Evan said with a British accent.

"God, you're too similar to Lance."

Evan stopped spinning, and looked at the back of Keith's head, as Keith laid his head on the counter, covering his eyes.

"Lance, huh?"

Keith groaned.
"Gah, fuck me. What? You jealous too?"

Evan laughed.
"Firstly, been there, done that, now I work at your parlour."

Keith groaned.

"Secondly, did you say 'too'? How many single bachelor's are in your area, Keith? There are more people jealous of your sudden change in relationship status?"

Keith simply held up a middle finger over his shoulder.

Evan rolled his eyes, even though Keith couldn't see it.
"Sooo, who's jealous?"

"It doesn't matter. I can handle it."
Keith said, right before pulling a magazine over his head to block out the fluorescent lights.

"Yeah, clearly you got it all handled well."
Even said under his breath.
Evan stood, and walked up behind Keith, putting a hand on his back.
"Alright Keithers-"
Keith tensed.
"- ...Keith, I meant. Tell me your ails, and maybe I got the salve for them."

"I don't think involving you would help."

Evan didn't move.
"But your going to anyways, because what other freaking options'ave you got?"

"Fine. It's Lance."

"He's jealous?"

"That's not the problem."

"Ah, so he is jealous of something. Me, perhaps?"

Keith tensed.
"Why would he be jealous of you?"

"Well, it makes sense he'd be jealous that you're friends with your ex."

Keith lifted his head to look at Evan, his indigo eyes annoyed, and piercing.
"For the last time, you aren't my ex. We had a few one night stands, and moved on. Why can neither of you get that?!"

Evan pulled his hand back.
"Right, so I hit the nail on the head then. He's jealous of me."

Keith didn't flinch.
"Yes. And he wants a serious relationship."

"Ah, with you? That was his first mistake. I learned that less-"

Keith shot up.
"For fucks sake, Evan! Can't you say a single thing that isn't bitter over the breakup?! You said you were over it!"