Jaded ||| Johanna Mason

twenty-five

So sorry this update took so long. I got stuck because I'd planned to write something spicy but then lost the motivation to do it and just never felt I had the inspiration to commit to it. Then I realized I didn't actually have to write it, so here we are! There might be smut scenes later in the book but for now, I leave you with afterglow/fade to black so there's an actual update. Enjoy!

Jade Machry was many things to many people. A heartless, vicious bitch in the eyes of the Capitol and district citizens, a sick, twisted monster to her deceased mother, and a stubborn, aggravating girl to the other victors. Especially those in her own district.

There was one person afforded the ability to see beyond it. See beyond the gruff exterior, the hurtful words, and the attitude. One person in the entire, living, world who could see Jade Machry stripped down to her barest parts, deepest desires, and most hidden feelings.

Johanna Mason.

It wasn't easy to get to that point, Jade made sure of that. But they were there.

Johanna Mason knew more than any other living person was allowed to. She knew that beneath all of the anger, there was a little girl forced to take on too much responsibility at a young age. A little girl who had the joy of life beaten out of her at the academy. A little girl with no choice but to lose herself to live. A little girl terrified after losing her father, terrified of the Hunger Games.

A little girl whose only wish was to have felt the love of her mother one more time before she was dead. But that could never happen.

Johanna Mason knew that for all the flaunting done by Capitol magazines about Jade's personality at parties, she really just wanted to be loved. Wholly and eternally loved by just one person. One person who would never leave her.

That was made clear by what happened when Johanna showed up at the Two suite. Invitation accepted.

Jade spent almost every waking hour being judged in some way, by fans in the Capitol or her peers or citizens in the districts, and still, she'd never been perceived like that. It was like Johanna had peeled back her skin and revealed her steadily beating heart, like she'd been stripped back to all her most vulnerable parts. There was an intimacy to it that Jade loved, a level of romance in being laid out at her most vulnerable, seen for who she truly was, and still being desired in such an all-consuming way.

No one expected the cold-hearted bitch from 2 to need everything to be soft. Quiet gasps, intertwined hands, praise. But Jade couldn't handle anything else, not when her first time was a forceful thing under threat of her mother being killed. Yet Johanna held no qualms about it.

It was a learning experience for both of them. Despite what people assumed, the fame and fans and flaunted parties, the life of a victor was lonely. Jade had been prepared to accept that fact for the sake of her own mental sanity.

But having Johanna wrapped around her, bodies pressed as close as they possibly could be, and finally letting someone hold her, Jade wondered how she could ever live without it. She would never be the same. Not after being able to experience Johanna like that.

A warm body, whispered praises, and fingers dancing across her bare skin creating little patterns she could identify. Tracing hearts that Johanna kissed afterward. Because beneath all of Johanna's hatred, she had a lot of love to give too.