So Far Away ✔

008

. . .

DÍS

. . .

A trickle of blood ran down her cheek, caused by a branch that had hit her face during her hasty search. Dís paid no attention to the wound.

"Fíli!"

Dís knew it was unwise to call her son's name. The last time she'd roamed through these woods, she'd been robbed and almost raped. She might even have died if Scar hadn't saved her. The gods hadn't been pleased with her at all lately, so she shouldn't take unnecessary risks, even though her whole search was something the elves and Thorin would have not recommended.

Dís didn't blame them. They lacked the instincts of a mother. No matter how exhausted she felt, she wouldn't be able to sleep as long as her son was gone.

Stumbling she worked her way through the bushes. Thorny branches found a way underneath her skirt and grabbed at the skin of her lower legs. Grunting she moved on, knowing her wounded mother's heart would leave deeper scars than whatever plant.

Her throat was burning of thirst. It gave Dís some sense of penance. She deserved to suffer, for she'd abandoned her son. She didn't understand how she could have let him out of her sight and she had to pay dearly for her carelessness.

The humidity level was high and even though that was a punishment Dís underwent willingly, it messed with her senses. She felt light-headed and weak. Sometimes she wanted to sit down to rest, but she was afraid she would never get up again. Perhaps she would waste precious time and find Fíli's dead body, if that wasn't already what Fate had in store for her...

Sometimes her heart skipped a beat because she thought to hear him, but after struggling, screaming helplessly and an emotional outburst she realized her imagination was playing tricks with her.

Dís knew she was an easy target, for she was just scouring forward and didn't try to detect danger at all. Only a random coincidence could bring her back to her son, for she'd gone far afield and she didn't even know if she was looking in the right direction, nor did she know how she could find her way back.

~

Eventually a time came despondency was taking over again. She fell down on her knees and started to sob. If she was already feeling so lost, how would Fíli feel? Or wouldn't he think about anything at all because he'd joined his father?

"I'm sorry, Famin," she muttered. "I can't do this. I can't do this without you."

By way of a response she suddenly heard footsteps behind her. Dís looked over her shoulder. Through her tears she saw someone coming closer. Her head however seemed to be filled with void and she wasn't able to distinguish friend from enemy.

Or was it Famin? Had he miraculously returned?

"Dís..."

Tears clouded her eyes as she looked up to him. "I – I missed you so much," she mumbled. "Are you here to take me away?"

"Yes, I will take you home."

His voice sounded friendly and loving and Dís showed a watery smile. She felt a hand on her back.

"Can you stand up?"

Dís shook her head. "Hold me," she whispered. "Please, hold me."

She felt hollow when he didn't respond to her wish. Was he angry? Did he know what had happened to her son?