Rainy Weather (Kazurei)

Raindrop on a Flower Petal

"My flowers are dead." I say with disappointment. We returned to the apartment and started getting back into our usual routine. It's weird being back after what happened. "Of course they are, they weren't watered in awhile." Kazuki used to nitpick on me because I would take better care of my plants than myself. "Guess I need to buy new ones." I sigh picking up the plant pots. We came back late last night, Miri was asleep when we picked her up."I thought the rain would be enough to keep them alive." "Actually, I think your plants drowned." Kazuki pointed out the water dripping from the pot I'm holding. "Oh, hmm." "Tell me again how you ended up liking plants so much." he says while he helps me clear the balcony of the ruined greenery. "There was an old woman I met when I was thirteen who showed me her flower garden. Taught me that taking care of them can be a way to keep myself busy when things are bad." The red roses, the tulips, all of the different varieties of flowers she had were all so lovely to look at. "I guess that explains why the balcony was so well taken care of while the inside was a disaster when I first moved in." "I tried to have my own little garden when I was with my father still. I had to watch as he had somebody destroy it all. He told me I shouldn't waste my energy on something so pointless." "I remember now. Flowers were your happy place. I take this as an excuse for us to go shopping. Miri might enjoy your hobby too, you should teach her." The dead flowers were removed from their pots, now the balcony looks barren and boring. "Maybe." Miri started going to daycare again, but not before Kazuki and his overprotective nature sewed a small chip to the inside of her shirts so he can keep track of her location. Given the circumstances I understand, but I don't imagine someone would be able to kidnap her at daycare. The building is gated and the kids are always closely monitored. They also call the parents if someone else comes to collect a child to check if they're an unknown individual. I know this from when I tasked Kyutaro-san with picking her up. But of course, better safe than sorry. "The repairs went very well. You can't tell a gun fight broke out up here. I spoke to the building manager about the security, they're adding in additional measures to make it harder for break ins to occur." Kazuki sheds some light on the recent events. "Guns are enough security for me." I know I'm acting a little cold, but I am genuinely in a good mood. It's just how I am. "I agree with that. You're like a one man army." he giggles. "Oh, and remind me tonight that I teach you to make Onigiri. Hopefully we get left alone long enough for it to finally happen." I had forgotten about the onigiri, kinda looking forward to it. "I'd hate to bring down the mood, but we do need to discuss what to do with Miri tonight. She's in danger. So working out a solution should be done soon." "What are you suggesting?" Is he saying we need to leave her somewhere? "Miri isn't safe as long as she's with us. I don't want her to leave, we built up so much together. The last thing I ever wanted was see go." his expression is solem. "But I definitely don't want her to die just because she's here. They made it clear that she's a target just like me. It's not safe for her to stay here anymore." "Let's talk about this later like you said." "Yeah, no reason to waste a good day. Anyway, I'm bringing you along with me to the store so we can get groceries and decide what to make for dinner." When was the last time I joined Kazuki for grocery shopping? Huh, I guess I've not been in a long time. "Okay. Can we go get more flowers now?" "Of course. I'll get the car keys.
What he said about Miri sticks with me. Do we really have to give her up? I... The possibility of her getting hurt is very real. There's only so much we can do to protect her when there's people out to kill us too.

———

"These ones look nice." Kazuki is helping me find flowers for my garden. "Not a fan of lilacs." "Then what about these? They have a funny name. Baby's Breath." I couldn't help but smile slightly at his suggestion. "Have you ever heard of flower language?" I ask. "Flowers can't talk, how can they have a language?" "Flowers have different symbolisations and have meanings. This particular flower means everlasting love." it was only sheer coincidence that this flower would catch his eye, but it makes me happy nonetheless. "Why do you know that?" "I like flowers." "Fair enough...ah." Kazuki gasps. He's looking at hydrangeas. "Do you want those?" I pick up a pot of blue hydrangeas. These might be a good addition. "What do blue hydrangeas symbolise?" he suddenly looks tired, what's going on with him? "Forgiveness and regret. People use them when trying to apologise for something usually." As I say that his face looks even worse. "Are you okay?" "Yeah...I am. Sorry, was thinking about something." In the recent times I have been more open with my past than I normally would be. I don't like talking about the things I went through growing up. It's too painful to dwell on. However, Kazuki hasn't given much in return. I know very basic facts about his upbringing and bits from his last relationship. His reasons for not talking about the days before we met each other are the same as mine. The past simply hurts. I want to know more about him. He puts on a fake smile and goes back to looking at various flowers and asking me questions about them. Kazuki is a horrible actor, he couldn't lie to save his life. For now, I'll play along and ask him back in the car. "Clove pink carnation. Miri would love these. Do they also have a meaning?" he crouches over the pink flowers, touching their soft petals. "They mean, I'll never forget you." I answer. "Rather fitting, huh? These are coming with us." Kazuki adds them to our shopping cart. I want to cheer him up somehow so he can go back to enjoying his time. But that would be embarrassing. I spotted a display of red chrysanthemum and made the choice That I was getting one specifically for Kazuki. I pluck one out after examining it for imperfections then hide it behind my back already suffering from the nervousness. I hadn't said it to him yet, he has to me before. I think the chance that it can make him feel better might be worth it, so...here goes nothing. "Kazuki...this is for you." I reveal the the vibrant red flower to him. "It's lovely. Is there a meaning to it?" Obviously he was going to ask, but I was sort of hoping he wouldn't. "It means..." I hesitate for a moment. "I love you." Kazuki is taken aback but then smiles. "Heh, your face is almost as red as this flower, Rei." Immediate regret sets in, but my idea seemed to have worked at least. "Then, here's another love flower from me to you." Kazuki also plucks a one from the display. "People are staring at us." We're the only men in the shop and all those women just watched us exchange flowers. Now it's his turn to be embarrassed. He's still uncomfortable with being seen doing couple-like things in public with me. I still couldn't care less what they think, they have nothing to do with us. Kazuki let his guard down outside of the apartment which doesn't really ever happen unless we're at the park with Miri. To me, him in his vulnerable state in my favourite. It feels like I'm seeing Kazuki as he would be if he were a normal person. It's nice. "So do you think you have enough for the balcony?" "Yes, this should be enough." I look over the cart that's packed with colourful flowers. "These might make the space look even better than what it used to be, Rei." Kazuki comments. I nod in agreement, and so we head to checkout.
"Flowers are way to expensive." Kazuki groans as we load up the car. "Why are you complaining, You didn't pay." "I know, but why do plants cost so much? The final price of our trip was ¥12,423." "As if you don't spent ten times that amount when you go to the mall." I roll my eyes. "But, they're plants!" "You're a little too worked up over this." Kazuki finds the weirdest things to be upset about. "Oh by the way, Rei. You've been a lot more expressive lately, I enjoy seeing you react instead of being emotionless all day." "Is that a compliment?" "That came out wrong, but yes." "What about you?" I'm going to make him tell me what bothers him. "What about me?" "What was that in the shop? You just suddenly looked down, when we were looking at the hydrangeas. Do they remind you of something from back then?" "It's not important, I'm over it now." he's not convincing. "Kazuki, you're a bad actor. I told you stuff about my past after you knew I hate talking about it. Why not tell me about yours?" "I made peace with what happened. I guess I got caught off my guard and remembered." I can only assume this has something to do with his wife. Does he not want to make me jealous by talking about her? "My sole focus in my life right now is my family. One day I will tell you everything, but for now we need to stay with the present." In other words, he's not wanting to tell me. Probably won't be smart to press the issue further. Still though...it's not fair. "Is making onigiri hard?" I drop the subject. "It's very easy, I'll show you all the steps so you can see just how easy it really is. I will make you the onigiri making professional!" I have serious doubts in my ability to do normal human stuff, but I'm okay with trying anything if Kazuki is there to show me the way. "It's pretty interesting that you know so much about flowers. I never knew how much you like them. You did take great care of the plants you had, but I figured you did it just for the sake of doing something...You might want to wait before setting your flowers out now that I think about it. More rain is coming soon." The rainy season had already long since passed, it's a wonder how there's been rain nearly each day this past month. Rain is good weather in my opinion, so I don't mind it at all. The sound of the water against the windows in the apartment is calming, and also the sun is too bright. Heavy clouds add more ambiance to my gaming time. Kazuki is the complete opposite. He despises this kind of weather, he is firmly a sunny weather kind of guy.

———

"Can I have a flower, Rei Papa?" Miri locked eyes with all the spots the second she came inside. "Sure." I show her the Clove pink carnations Kazuki picked out. "Put the pot on the window sill in your room, don't forget to water it. Ask Rei Papa if you need help taking care of it." "Is that a good idea?" I ask him. Miri ran off happy with her flowers. "It can teach her some responsibility. It's inevitable that one day she asks us for a pet." "I can take care of a pet." "I know you want a cat. I'll make you a deal, if Miri is capable of keeping her flowers alive with your assistance for a month, we can look into adopting a kitten." I feel a spark of excitement in me. I love cats, I never got to have a cat. The thought of finally getting the opportunity for that to happen is exciting. "Alright, I'll accept your deal." It'll be easy. "You're not allowed to tend to her flowers yourself, she has to do it herself by your own teaching and advice." Ugh, now it's not so easy. "Fine, fine."
"Well, shall we get started making dinner then? You and Miri will be my kouhai chefs." Kazuki declares. This is going to be a chore...