The darkness of the clouds represents my mind. The rain are the tears that I cannot shed. The thunder are my screams for salvation. Will I ever find the sunlight? Will the storm come to an end? Where is my sunny weather?
A week later
"Kyu-chan found Miri's mother." Kazuki hung up his phone. "And?" "She wants to meet with us." Does that mean she wants her back after so long? "When?" "She'll meet us as the park tomorrow afternoon. She told Kyu-chan that she's been looking all over for her. Apparently there's been a change of heart." he says with his voice full of doubt. "Maybe she feels guilty." People like her piss me off. You can't just decide one day that you want to step up after abandoning your child. In the end this isn't about me or my feelings towards her. Imagining life without Miri with us sounds dull. I got so accustomed to her making noise all day long that the silence that will come with her absence would be depressing. We changed a lot of our habits for her sake, would we revert back to how we used to be when she's gone? There's a lot of pain and sadness on Kazuki's face, do I have the same expression as he does? "It's not ideal, but we'll do what needs to be done. People like us were never meant for a happy normal life. We belong to the underworld after all. Two killers can't be parents." His head hangs low. "What are you talking about?" How could he say such a thing?
Two killers can't be parents.
"We kill and hurt people for a living. There's no chance in hell that we can break away from this lifestyle for good." Has he resigned himself to such a fate? Kazuki was the one who brought her home and forced her onto me till I accepted her presence. "You're not the type to give up so easily." "She's our weak spot. Anyone can see that. All someone would have to do is get to Miri to destroy us. What's the point in any of this if she gets killed? What are we fighting for? Putting her somewhere safe is what I care about the most."
The words of a scarred man.
"Losing someone you love...I can't go through it again. I refuse to go through it again." "What about me, Kazuki? You're taking the chance to be with me even though you're afraid. Why is that?"
Tell me the truth.
Tell me about everything that troubles you.
Allow me to share the pain with you.
Allow me to take on your burdens.
No.
No.
Something isn't right. Where is Kazuki's bright demeanour?
What is happening to me?
Make it stop.
Everything is spinning out of control.
I can't be his peacemaker. I can't be the person he needs me to be.
It's all falling apart.
Make it stop.
Make it stop.
Make it stop.
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YOU ARE READING
Rainy Weather (Kazurei)
FanficWhat is it like to love? I've wondered that for years. Growing up there was never any of that unconditional parental love and affection like others get. Maybe it's selfish to have such thoughts, in the end this life I'm living has no room for emotio...
