Find me in the shadows (Darklina fanfic)

Chapter 7

The room where I was settled, was made of the same sand rock. The twilight outside didn't change. I felt tired, so I fell on the bed trying to sleep. But sleep didn't come. It was strange, after all this time, I didn't see dreams. I lost count of time, while I was just laying with closed eyes. I hoped to hear him whispering inside my head, but it was silent.

After long hours without sleep, I stood up from the bed with a desire to have a walk. It seemed like all corridors there were the same. But then I reached an enormous hall. I understood that this was Elizaveta's part of the castle. Everything was made like honeycombs. I suppressed a laugh because it felt like I was in the hive. There were roses around, blooming and dieing.

I didn't hear Elizaveta's steps, so I shuddered when I saw her.

«I had no intention of scaring you,» she said, softly. «But I am happy that you find a way to me, the Sun Saint.»

«I just looked around,» I replied. «Very... emm... elegant place.» I should have tried to find a better word.

She snorted. «This castle is our prison.» She came closer to me, and I heard the buzzing of bees. «I wondered, how did you feel when you killed him?»

I felt a chill run through my body as I stayed frozen in place. This question took me by surprise. I swallowed a lump in my throat.

«I can't remember,» I lied. I had no desire to reveal my actual feelings to Elizaveta. «Relief, perhaps, that all ended. He was dying anyway, merzost poisoned him.»

«Sounds like you justify yourself,» Elizaveta uttered.

I cast a glance at her. I could read her expression, but something worried me about her.

«I knew him, too,» she said, turning her gaze from me.

I didn't hide the surprised look on my face.

«Oh yes, all of us crossed paths with him at one time or another. I met him when he had only just begun his service to the Ravkan kings. When I was still in my youth.»

Saints, she must be older even than him, or Baghra.

«And? What was he like then?»

«Arrogant. Idealistic. Beautiful.» Elizaveta smiled ruefully. «I met him many times throughout the years, and he adopted many guises to hide his true self. But the faces he chose were always lovely. He was vain.»

«I don't think he had such quality.»

Elizaveta raised her eyebrows.

«He wasn't vain, just smart, hiding his true self. Having many names, and personalities, was his way to survive,» I said, touching one of the roses which surrounded the room.

«You knew him only as General Kirigan, the last name he took,» Elizaveta smiled smugly. The rose withered under my touch. I sighed.

«I knew him under his first name. The one his mother gave him,» I replied.

Elizaveta's smile disappeared from her face.

«And for me, I will always remember him as...,» I paused, stopping myself from revealing his true name. «Not the Darkling.»

«What was his true name?» I saw interest in Elizaveta's eyes.

«It's not my secret to reveal,» I answered.

***

I didn't understand how many days passed. There was always twilight. I was desperate for rest, just to sleep for a while. The same situation was with hunger, I wanted to eat, but I didn't feel hungry. Sometimes I thought that I should have died, and this was purgatory. Because it wasn't like heaven or hell.