My Way Swoon

🌙Jake POV🌙

TW Just a little bit more mental health stuff❤️

She was fast asleep on the couch. I snuck away into her bathroom and washed my face. I felt sick. I hovered over the toilet for a second, thinking I might puke. It didn't come though. I just sat on the floor and started to replay everything I had said to her over the last few weeks.

I had called her old bedroom depressing. Fuck, that was insensitive. I couldn't help but feel guilty. For all of it. God, why did I have to be such an asshole back then? I could have just fucking forgiven her and she probably never would have gone through any of it. I was too busy forcing myself to hate her to even see that she was struggling.

I still couldn't believe Josh and Sammy never told me. It felt like something I should have known. Part of me was angry at them, another part of me was just shocked.

I sent a text to Josh. It probably wasn't very nice of me but I was letting that angry part of me take control.

Me
You didn't think I deserved to know that Lena tried to kill herself???

I wasn't expecting a response. It was late and I knew he was with Nell. He still got back to me though.

👹Josh👹
I'm not going to discuss this through text. I'll call you in the am. Get some rest, Jake. I love you.

Fucking asshole. I came out of the bathroom and heard Lena humming. I stood still, trying to figure out what song it was this time. In the past month I had heard Love Shack, Rhiannon and Bennie and the Jets. She woke me up every time.

Tonight was different though. It stopped me in my tracks. She was humming Harvest Moon. Harvest moon. As in the song that was playing the first time I kissed her. The song that was playing the first time we had sex. It was the first song I taught her on guitar and I  think it might have even been playing the first time I told her I loved her.

I went into the kitchen and got a glass of water. I sipped from it as her humming faded. I debated moving her to her bed or just climbing onto the couch with her. I figured she'd probably be more comfortable on the bed so I lifted her up.

"You're still here?" she yawned.

"I'm here, babe."

"Are you staying?"

"Yeah. I'm staying."

"I should brush my teeth," she pointed out.

"Are- Yeah, okay."

I set her down and she stumbled to the bathroom. I stood in the doorway as I watched her put the toothpaste on her toothbrush and then begin scrubbing her teeth. She turned around to face me and held her arm out for a hug.

I let out a soft laugh but stepped into her hold. She wrapped her arm around my back and rested her head against my shoulder. She bent down to spit and then splashed some water on her face. She pumped some face wash on her hands and began washing her face.

"Do you need to use anything?" she offered.

"I already washed my face," I told her.

"Without my permission?! This is pricey face wash, Jake!"

I loved when she played mad. I couldn't help but smile. She smiled back at me and then rinsed her face off.

"Did you brush your teeth?" she asked.

"I didn't bring a toothbrush."

"Are you grossed out to use mine?"

I stepped closer to her, cupping her chin with one hand and drawing her closer to me. Then I leaned in and gave her a deep kiss. I ran my tongue over hers, massaging it against mine for a few seconds before pulling back.