Meet Me On The Roof

Chapter 5

"B-Boyfriend?" I finally squeak out, looking him in the eyes.

His eyes grow wide in fear.

"Oh, I-I didn't mean, I'm not, just, oh God..." He trails off and puts his head in his hands.

"Oh no, Phil, I didn't mean it like that, oh God. I'm sorry." I begin to explain, "I'm going to be your friend, no matter what your sexuality is." I tell him sincerely.

He looks at me, trapping me blue cages we call eyes.

"Really? You mean it?" He asks quietly.

"Definitely." I say, putting my hand on his shoulder.

"Just don't tell PJ and Chris yet, I don't know how they would react to this." He says.

I chuckle. "I wouldn't worry about that. If it makes you feel any better, I'm gay as well and when I told them, they were extremely supportive. But don't worry, I won't tell them, I promise."

He gives me a long stare before blurting out, "You're gay?"

I laugh wholesomely. "Yeah, I am."

He smiles, with his tongue pointing out. "Cool." He says, mostly to himself.

An awkward silence creeps its way into our dying conversation. I look at the stars for the millionth time and attempt to count them. I count the stars a lot. One time I got to 13,00 but fell asleep. My goal is not to count all the stars, for that is impossible because no two nights are the same. My goal is to wonder.

I lay on my back, taking in the scenery before me. Closing my eyes, I take a deep breathe, the cool are filling my lungs.

"Is it always this cold?" Phil asks, slightly shivering. We were both in t-shirts and black skinnies, so I can see how he is cold especially, considering we live in London.

"I don't notice it." I tell him, "I've come up here so often it doesn't bother me anymore."

Phil nods, putting his knees to his chest and securely wrapping his arms around them.

"Hey, where are your parents? It's fairly late, shouldn't they be home by now?"

I knew that question would be brought up eventually, so I might as well get it over with. "My parents are never home, it's either business trips, sleepovers at the office, exedra. They have so much work. I've lived this way since I was little." I explain.

"But doesn't that bother you?" Phil asks sadly.

I shrug. "I told you, I've lived this way since I was a little kid. This is my normal." I say.

"I would rather have parents that were never here than than a dead one and... Never mind." He trails off suspiciously.

"Yeah, I guess my problems are nothing to complain about. Other people have it worse than me." I say casually.

Phil looks transfixes his gaze with mine, flicking his fringe out of his face.
"Dan, does it bother you that you don't have your parents around?" He asks, not letting go if his stare. I think about it for a moment. Does it bother me? Sure, I'm a bit lonely sometimes, but that's what PJ and Chris are for. I don't have anyone to help guide me through life though. I don't have anybody to turn to for help.

"Yes." I say quietly, breaking his gaze. Phil continued to stare at me.

"Then you have every right to talk about it if it's something that bothers you or upsets you, no one can use their problems against your own to justify that 'they have it worse'." he says calmly.

"I can't talk to anyone about it though," I say quietly. "PJ and Chris aren't exactly the listening type."

Phil plasters a big smile on his face, his tongue poking out and his features being illuminated by the moon.

"Lucky for you, I am." he says quietly. "You have my number, if something is ever bothering you, just text me."

"Alright, thank you Phil." I say.

"Anytime." He says, still smiling. He pulls out his phone, scrolling down notifications after notifications and begins to panic.

"Oh God, oh God, oh God, oh God, oh God." He panics, getting up.

"Phil, what's wrong?" I ask concerned.

"I need to get home, now." He says frantically. I stand up, leaving the blanket where it is because I'll most likely be back after I drop off Phil. He practically dives through my window and runs down the stairs. When I finally get down to the front entrance, Phil already has his shoes on and his bag slung across his shoulders. I reach for my shoes but Phil grabs my hand.

"Please just go barefoot, it'll take too long, I-I'm already late. Please" he begs. I shrug and jog out to the car. Phil is nearly hyperventilating and I'm getting seriously concerned. Once Phil tells me how to get to his place, we're on the road.

"Phil, what was all that about? Why are you so worried to get back so soon?" I ask, trying to keep calm

He closes his eyes and takes a deep breathe. ''I'm late and I can't tell you why I'm so worried, but I will one day." He tells me. I shrug and turn on some Muse to try and calm Phil.

5 minutes later, he tells me to stop the car.

"But we're not there yet" I persist.

Phil looks away embarrassed. "I-I know but we're close enough, I just I don't want you to see where I live because its really embarrassing."

"Alright Phil... I'll text you later then?" I ask, smiling to ease his anxiety.

"Y-Yeah, definitely." He promises. He gets out of the car and I roll down my window.

"Bye Phil, I had fun today, make sure to sit with PJ, Chris, and I at lunch tomorrow!" I say as he walks away. He turns to face me and waves.
"Bye Dan, see you tomorrow!" He yells back.

I take a deep breathe, feeling like I had been holding my breathe this whole time. Damn, that boy is great. I start my car back up, and begin to make my way home, where I will spend the rest of my night on the roof. Sleep is for wimps.

A/N

OH GOD IM SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG TO UPDATE I SINCERELY APOLOGIZE HAVE A COOKIE. but honestly I just wasn't that motivated to write, which is why this chapter is so crap, sorry about that. ill try and update soon, but there are some stressful things going on in my life rn and that partnered with finals and stuff I'm gonna be really stressed, so I apologize for lack of updates. But summer starts soon so ill be able to update a lot in the summer yayyy. bye guys, and again I'm so sorry, ily all <3

~Kiwi