Autumn in Philadelphia Trilogy

Saudade: Fishing for Answers

AN: The birthday Shawn mentions is detailed in Flashbacks: Birthday Wishes & Valentine Kisses. The nightmare Audrey recalls in Keys. And the text in bold italics is from the fourth season episode "Fishing for Virna".

"Why didn't you say something sooner, Riles?"

The early morning air was chilly and the girls, in their pajamas and spring jackets, huddled together on the floor of the old treehouse that had been built when Riley's grandparents moved in decades ago. It was rarely used anymore unless the younger boys played in it; Riley and Julia had outgrown it a long time ago.

"I didn't want to ruin your time with my aunt and uncles, Maya. You have an incredible opportunity to get what we've dreamed about for you. I want you to have a dad who loves you as much as mine loves me. I want you to be my cousin officially."

Maya stuck Riley's cold hand in her jacket pocket. Her friend shivered against her. She wanted a private place to talk without worrying about getting caught by the adults, but she was now regretting suggesting the treehouse. She didn't realize that Philadelphia mornings were still so cold in April.

There were a lot of things she had done recently without realizing the consequences.

"But you should have told me," she insisted, "that you were feeling like this. How could telling me change anything?"

Riley smiled through her tears. "Because you'd worry and focus on me instead of Uncle Shawn. You need to spend as much time with him as you can, Maya. He won't have a lot of it because he also needs to be with Uncle Jon."

"Okay. But why didn't you tell me before we came here? You could have told me at school."

Riley didn't answer right away. She stared into the distance as tears began to fall again. Then abruptly she sat up, pulled her legs under her, and looked up at the ceiling.

"I was afraid if I said anything out loud it would change everything."

May frowned. Normally, she could follow Riley through whatever rabbit hole she went down, but she was lost. It felt like her best friend was speaking in a riddle. "What're you talking about? What would change?"

"You know my parents are relationship goals to, like, everyone, right?"

"Yeah."

"I don't want them to become relationship un-goals."

"Riles," she said even more confused. "I don't understand."

"Uncle Jon and Aunt Audrey are the second greatest love story I've ever heard."

"Your mom and dad being number one." That was the only thing Riley said that she could follow.

Riley smiled sadly and nodded.

"I'm glad, Riles. Really." Maya squeezed her hand." Gives me hope that Mom and Shawn can be number three, but what does that have to do with anything?"

The wet, glossy look of unshed tears reflected in the other girl's eyes. "Uncle Jon and Aunt Audrey aren't the same anymore."

Maya blinked. "How?"

"Have you heard Uncle Jon yell lately?"

Maya's face pinched into a deep frown, and she pinched her lips together as she thought. "Well, yeah. A little. Very little."

"He never yelled before."

"Before what?"

"Before Aunt Audrey found out what was going on at his job."