greatest desires

Chapter 4

I've ignored grey now for a couple of weeks. I don't wanna talk to him until he decides to get sober.

It's hard to avoid him though, his stare always manages to make its way all through my body, making me feel ways that I've never felt before. but I have to brush it off, I can't let him in.

I push the door to the cafe open, and there's a guy I haven't seen before working behind the counter.

"hey, I've never seen you here before?" I say to him, and he nods, chuckling.

"I was on holiday for a couple weeks, so you must've joined whilst I was away, leyla right?" His voice is deep and sketchy, definitely doesn't seem like the type of guy to work in a cafe, but guess I shouldn't assume.

"That's me!" I smile, and walk to behind the counter to start my shift, guess he's working with me. "Where's lana? She's normally here?"

"Lana has reduced her hours, she only works Tuesdays and Saturdays now, she decided it was too much for her." He explains, but that sucks, because I love talking to Lana, she's like my best friend.

"What's your name?" I say

"Zak."

We talk for a while about random things, and how our life's are and what we wanna do. Like, how I wanna get rich one day and live in a giant mansion, and have kids and a cute dog. He just wants to settle down somewhere, maybe have a parter, he wants to own a club though.

I guess that would be pretty cool.

Flash forward to a couple hours later, when her shift is finishing.

I yawn, closing off all the tills after a long day of work, zac went home, so I was left shutting up store again, although they probably shouldn't trust me with that- grey always forgets to let me.

I notice his presence almost instantly as he walks though the door, his large figure blocking almost the entire door. He walks over to me and places his hands on the counter.

I ignore him though, I don't wanna talk to him.
He knows I don't wanna talk to him, so I don't know why he keeps trying. He doesn't even like me, so what more could he want.

"lou." He mutters. He's been calling me that for a while now, I don't know why, but he refuses to call me anything except lou.

I brush him off, making sure to put the dishes in the dishwasher and starting it, trying to distract myself from him.

I walk into the back rooms to take my apron off and hang it up, when I notice a hand around my neck suddenly, he pulls me to turn to him and moves my chin to look at him.

"Lou. stop' ignoring me." He grumbles.

I look away but he just grabs my jaw, keeping my focus completely on him.

we just stand in silence, not breaking eye contact for what feels like forever, when his hands move from my jaw to my hips, what is he doing?

I feel the cold wall press against my back and I wince, remembering how he threw me against the floor that time.

He's now looking down at me, examining every inch of me, while his thumbs caress my hips.
I don't stop him though, it's like I like the feeling of his hands on my body, like I want to take things further. I like the chaos.

I look up at him and gulp, seeing how close together we actually are. His eyes are locked onto mine, keeping my gaze from wondering.

His hand slowly makes its way from my hips to my behind, wait, he's gonna touch my bum-

I lean my head back on the wall, giving into his affection and just let him do it.

I feel his cold metal rings touch my bare skin, slightly gasping at the sudden feeling on my behind, a couple months ago, I would never have let him do this, but we're alone. There's no one that can come in, jace won't see us, and by the look of his eyes, he isn't drunk.

Thank god for that.

"Lou." He sighs, a disappointed look filling his face, I've never seen him change emotions so much, normally all I get is a blank stare or a small chuckle.

I feel his head rest against mine, taking in all his body warmth. He plants a soft kiss on the top of my head, with that, I wrap my arms around his torso, suddenly feeling bad for ignoring him all this time, and pull him in for a hug.

"I want you Lou." He mutters quietly. I've never seen a side of him like this, he seems shy and quiet? It's different.

he lifts my jaw up again, but instead of being held in eye contact, he presses his lips against mine, keeping his hold on my jaw tight while his mouth explores mine. I give in. I feel his tongue fighting to get in my mouth, and I let him, I let him hold me, I let him kiss me. I let him want me.

my hands make their way to his shirt, gripping on whilst he holds my jaw and strokes, making sure that I can't back out this time, I'm trapped with him.

What am I doing?

we part lips after a little bit, me struggling to catch my breath. It's embarrassing, but that was my first kiss. I've never ever kissed anyone before, I've never met another guy before, he's the first person to kiss me.

It felt like magic, the short intimate scene we shared, I loved every second of it though. I get on my tiptoes and pull his face down to kiss him again, wanting more, and he lets me. We share a kiss again, passionately exploring each others mouths. His hand makes it's way back to my booty, and I let a little moan out into his mouth as he caresses it, accidentally.

His hands then make way to the other side, edging me for more.My face feels hot and flushed. Like I'm on fire.

I gulp, feeling his hand slowly make its way down my shorts, but I pull his hand away quickly.

"not here.." I mumble. I don't know if he even heard me.

he just nods and picks me up, gripping onto my backside as he walks me out of the shop.

"grey I need to lock the sh-"

I'm stopped when he places another soft kiss on my lips, heading towards his car. I rest my head on his shoulder, unaware of what would happen next.

He starts driving as I stay, straddling his lap. I'm unsure of what just happened, my legs feel numb, but we didn't even get any further than kissing, he's the only man to ever have had me. Would that mean something to him?

we drive home and he takes me to my bedroom, laying me on the bed, but he just sighs and places my blanket on me, then walks out like nothing happened?

"don't ever speak of this again." He mutters, before closing the door, and I'm left, with complete silence.

Authors note
damn, grey messing w all our feelings rn😔
Maybe it just wasn't meant to be

#heartbreaker😒