( 𝐎𝐍 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐃 ) 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐈 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 • 𝘼𝙫𝙖𝙩𝙖𝙧

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍

trigger warning; miscarriage!

empty shell
( na'vi ▸ italics )

WHEN NÌNRRA HAD AWOKEN, SHE WAS CONFUSED AND IN A LOT OF PAIN. SHE GREETED MO'AT WHO WATCHED OVER HER WITH A SAD EXPRESSION. Then, the news broke and so did her heart. Nìnrra was pregnant, she was gonna be a mother. All the recent stress and fighting unfortunately resulted in her losing her baby. Nìnrra when she found out went ballistic, she screamed and cried. She destroyed anything in her path.

An hour later, she sat still and quiet. It was like she was watching herself from a different pov, she was there but she wasn't. She only moved from her position when Neytiri forced her to bathe. Honestly, Nìnrra silently prayed the water would take her under. Jake took care of her, he combed her hair and braided it, he dressed her when she was too exhausted to do it herself.

Months later, they found out Neytiri was pregnant. They were scared to break the news to Nìnrra but she didn't even react, just continued staring into space. That's all she did, was sit by Kinä and Nì'avwe's grave and just stare with a blank gaze. Jake and Neytiri were terrified, their mate was spiraling and they had no idea what to do. So, Neytiri tried to get her to be more involved in the pregnancy, and surprisingly, it worked. Somewhat. Nìnrra would listen to her complain about her pregnancy downsides and would silently hold her hand.

Nìnrra cried so much until she couldn't anymore. She felt so alone, her whole family dead. Her friends. When they found Tsu'Tey, she spiraled again, even more so when he asked about Kawkxan and she had to break the news. She wanted to march down to the base and slaughter every single human there, but her mates wouldn't allow her to even show up. Mo'at often gave her simple tasks to keep her busy, sometimes she would ramble about things while Nìnrra listened quietly. Nìnrra didn't talk anymore.

She barely ate, barely did anything. Sometimes, Nìnrra would find herself mindlessly talking to her stomach, begging for her baby to respond but she knew it was impossible. Neytiri's pregnancy was coming to a end, and so was Nìnrra's sanity. She would chuckle in the most quietest times, would talk to someone who wasn't there, her emotional outbursts were getting more and more harder to contain.

▾

Nìnrra thankfully, found Hoan. He was injured but nothing major. He often tried to get her to go riding, but she was a shell of the woman she used to be, now, she was nothing. Jake carefully approached Nìnrra who sat in her usual spot, her outbursts were mostly at him and he didn't wanna risk setting her off again. "Hey, Nini. Wanna fly with me?" Jake smiled at her and softly grabbed her hand. Nìnrra didn't move to show she even heard him but her ears flickered.

Jake took that as a yes, and guided her to his ikran, that he had for some reason named, Bob. Nìnrra followed him like she was a robot and she never responded to his rambling. Jake grabbed her hips and lifted her into his ikran before getting on behind her. He wrapped his arm around her waist to steady her, and they were off. The wind rushing against Nìnrra's face woke her up just a little bit. She didn't make any sounds but there was the smaller hint of a smile on her face.

Nìnrra wouldn't ever admit this but, she was thankful for Jake. Even though she made her hatred clear, he never gave up on her. Because, when she screamed at him to leave, her knew deep down that she wanted him, anybody, to stay. Jake made it his mission to get her to smile, if she smiled, she was one step closer to getting better. He didn't care about her going back to herself, he wanted her to be happy, to be healthy again. He didn't want her to be like a wall anymore.