Nothing in Between

03

When Clyde blinked her eyes open, she could barely ignore the intense pounding in her head. The worst part about it was the annoying sunlight getting in through the windows, completely illuminating her entire bedroom, which Clyde absolutely hated.

Slowly, she pulled herself to sit upright. Clyde loudly groaned as she rubbed her temples, her mouth opening to let out a tired yawn. God, she clearly fucking needed to drink some painkillers, but she didn't even know if she could stand up from her bed.

And right now, all Clyde wanted to do was stay in bed and scroll through her phone, even though she knew that it was just going to make her head hurt even more. Well, she would rather feel physical pain than remember an emotional wound that wouldn't heal.

There went that deep pit in Clyde's stomach again, making her feel like nothing.

It surely wasn't like Clyde constantly thought of the girl that made her this way, but it was totally difficult to forget her when her music kept being played, and her name was always being mentioned by her closest friends. Clyde literally couldn't escape her.

Obviously, Clyde couldn't handle hearing about how happy Taylor's music made her best friends feel, especially because of how crestfallen she made her feel. Clyde couldn't let it go. Besides, she never received the needed closure she had been longing for.

She never got anything from her since the day she left. No message, no letter—hell, not even one lyric that could have possibly been written about her. Well, it wasn't like Clyde would know, anyway. She hadn't listened to a single song of hers since that year.

Clyde wished she never promised to come back. She truly wished she didn't believe her when she said that it was only going to be a break, and they weren't breaking up. Clyde wished that her younger self wasn't so optimistic in hoping that she would return.

"Clyde! Are you awake?" she heard from the other side of the door, followed by knocking.

And Clyde flinched. She hadn't even realized that she was simply staring off into nothing, without even holding her phone. She dramatically grunted at the person on the other side of the bedroom door, exhaustedly rushing to grab her phone to check the time.

"I'll be out in a minute."

"Ugh, fine. Leo's coming over in fifteen, so be quick."

Humming, Clyde stood up from the bed, using her fingers to comb through her hair. She treaded to the door and forced it open without any warnings, causing Kate to jump from surprise. Clyde simply raised a questioning eyebrow, slightly scowling at her.

"Is he gonna bring breakfast?" Clyde asked.

"Fuck no. Bea and I are cooking brunch and you will eat it."

"Fine." Clyde nodded, stepping out of her room.

She steadily followed Kate into the kitchen, hearing soft music playing in the background, mixed with the sounds of something sizzling in a frying pan. If Clyde wasn't so exhausted and hungover, she probably would've rushed to turn that damned music off.

"No, I will not see you in my wildest dreams," Clyde grumbled, staring at the floor.

"No one asked," Kate replied, making Beatrice chuckle.

"Thanks, I know. I hope she does know that, though."

"Clyde, even if you didn't hate her, it's not like you have a chance." Kate shook her head.

And Clyde immediately tilted her head upwards, staring right into Kate's eyes. Her brows furrowed, tilting her head in a way that made Kate question her own words. Clyde silently held that stare for an entire minute, and she could practically see Kate's confusion.