"Bro r u sure this is ok?" The Singaporean asked the Filipino "ye" Phil said and started pouring the gasoline around the dinner table "yea this will definitely hurt my wallet, pls stop" Singapore, trying to bribe Phil to stop pouring gasoline "nawrrr" Phil finished pouring gasoline now pulling out a lighter "so we gonna start?" Malaysia asked "yaaa" Phil then lit up the gasoline covered table
"Ahh finally a day without those little shits" ASEAN sighed in pleasure as he went back home, wait is that a burning smell he sensed? Oh.. OHHH NO "SHIT I SHOULD OF HAVE NEVER LEFT THEM" ASEAN stared with wide eyes as the building burns in front of him "yea you shouldn't have" Brunei, pushing out burned debris while holding an injured Timor-Leste and coughed "yea you shouldn't have, anyways before you get mad; I tried to stop them but couldn't" Singapore kicked some debris off while carrying the maphilindo trio (or carrying Phil and Indo while kicking mal's unconscious body to safety) "ohh kayyy umm where are the others?" ASEAN asked worriedly "oh Thai, Myan, and Cam sneaked out, Laos is probably dead in the buildi-" before Brunei gets to finish his sentence suddenly a really injured Laos pat his shoulders "I'm alive unfortunately" Laos said disappointed he didn't die, damn the countries should really go to a therapist
"Ahh manipulating children is so fun" Myanmar talked to someone who is probably Thailand as he looks at the ASEAN building fall into the flames "Yeaa ikr even tho some of them are older than me I say me cuz u know ur the oldest haha" Thailand laughed awkwardly as they sip their tea quietly "uhhh you guys still haven't gave me the candy y'all promised.." Cam said "shut up CUM-bodia" Myanmar shouted at him causing Cambodia to tear up
Let's just say Myanmar, Thailand and Cambodia went to the burned building only to get their ass kicked by ASEAN(not Cambodia tho) "Myanmar ur literally the oldest yet u just leave them, why??" ASEAN asked "in my defence I was not being accompanied by an adult" Myan talked back "FUCKING CHRIST YOU ARE THE FUCKING ADULT" ASEAN shouted angrily at him "yea I'm but not a responsible one lol" myan went away to buy milk "bro left very sad like imagine being a coward" Thailand said "truly a giga ultra massive L" Phil, finally not being unconscious replied "yaa ikr" Thai said "anyways wanna a Boba tea, my treat" Thai said "hell yea boi" Phil happily walked to Thailand "ohhh can I jo-" before Brunei even get to finish his sentence ASEAN shouted at them "ARE Y'ALL SERIOUSLY JUST GONNA IGNORE THAT Y'ALL JUST BURNED OUR HOUSE?!?!" ASEAN shouted but this time ultra mega mad "yea lol bye" Phil grabbed Thai and brun's hand and ran away "LISTEN HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT THIS IS WHY YOUR PARENTS DIED" ASEAN shouted now catching some stares from people "wait no Phil I'm sorry" ASEAN realized what he said as he approach the pearl of the orient seas "ASEAN..." Phil muttered with tears threatening to spill down "I'm literally older than u, I might even be ur father cuz I'm one of the founders, don't talk to ur father like that" Phil talked back and the scene is quite funny as it looks like a 5'3 kid is talking back to a 6'5 man with sleeping problems I mean their views are not wrong tho anyways Phil ran away crying cuz why not and became emo
Let's just say ASEAN became those gacha life emo boy and died, Phil died from dehydration from crying but at least he is with his parents now and yea the end
Wow 2 oneshots except the oneshots are not very shitpost-y wowowowowwowowowowwowo
YOU ARE READING
Random Countryhumans Shit
Fanfictionmost of these were made in school also warning: Maybe include paedo shit S3xu@l themes Maybe abuse (sometimes some of these aren't really shitpost-y) Cannibalism Murder Gore Leave if any of these trigger you after all no one is forcing you
