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cruel summer - forevermoreharrington

"Do you like him?" Rafe gripped the steering wheel that little bit tighter. He had to ask but he wasn't completely sure he wanted her to answer. She could sit there and say yes, shattering his heart without even knowing it.

She stared out the window, everytime he glanced over he risked crashing the car off the side of the road but he just kept catching her reflection in the glass. If she took too long to answer he'd take that as an answer in itself.

"JJ?" With another glance, he could see her fusing with her necklace. The fact that JJ had touched it, held the chain in his hand didn't feel right. "Yeah, he's nice."

"He's a pogue." His voice was laced with envy, but he supposed it was better to sound bitter than for her to hear the slight shake in his voice.

"Rafe I don't know how to tell you this but so am I." She turned her head towards him with a smile on her face that tempted him to just drop it. It wasn't enough though, he was too stubborn to let this go just because she had a pretty smile.

He didn't see her like that anyway, she didn't cause trouble or bring up their differences so it was like they didn't exist and he certainly wasn't going to put her in the same category as JJ Maybank.

"It's different." He could feel her eyes on him, looking for something. Maybe he shouldn't have said different, maybe it held too much meaning. "So you do like him then, like romantically."

Rafe had never sounded so stupid or so nervous in his life, he was stuttering and turning red under the passing street lights. It wasn't fair how she could just sit there doing nothing and make him act like this. It was like he'd somehow swapped places with all those girls he'd taken out, he felt sorry for them now, he showed no signs of liking them and now he knew that was torture and that this was karma.

"I've never heard you say the word romantic." He turned to glare at her, the most serious look on his face that would've made anyone else turn away but she just smiled back at him like it was nothing. "No, he's just a friend, like Topper is."

"Like I am?" Say no, say no, say no. He prayed, even though he didn't believe in God, that she'd just say no. It would give him hope, hope that maybe one day she'd give him a second thought. Or maybe he'd just pull over and kiss her stupid.

"Sure." His whole body tensed, but she seemed anxious too. "Do you not like him by any chance?" Surely she wasn't asking him that, surely she already knew. He watched her fingers twist her necklace once again, she definitely was nervous about something.

He couldn't be expected to like JJ, not when he had spent the night talking to her, hugging her, making her laugh. She could've easily gone home with him instead tonight, let him kiss her, let him fuck her. Rafe was trying to not hold on to the past but it was impossible when she was concerned. He also needed to get the image of them together out of his head quickly.

"I don't trust him. Especially around you, what if he offers you something and you can't say no." He wasn't trying to lecture her, he was trying to keep his voice as soft as possible because she hadn't done anything wrong but he couldn't help the harsh way his words came out. Just falling one word after another with a bitterness she didn't deserve.

"He said the same about you and I ignored it." She shifted away from the window, closer to him forcing his senses to be overwhelmed with her perfume, something with flowers he still couldn't place. He just knew it was her. He gripped the steering wheel again. "So I'll ignore you too."

She grinned, overly pleased with herself. He couldn't help but smile, shaking his head he muttered to himself. "That's not annoying at all."

"Enough about that. I got an invite to Topper's garden party, I just have to figure out what a garden party is and then I'm good to go."