[UNDER HEAVY REVISION] Super Smash Bros Ultimate Headcanons

Fighter #04-E - Dark Samus

- This creepy Phazon creature can sneak up behind someone very easily. It’s part of the reason why Samus is so paranoid all the time.

- She somehow found a way to stick to walls and hang from ceilings, which scares the crap out of everyone.

- When she first met Richter, he thought she was a demon and chucked holy water at her. Needless to say, he was very lucky that he escaped with his life that day.

- When she's not wreaking havoc on distant alien planets, Dark Samus has quite a lot of time on her hands. She spends most of her free time reading encyclopedias, studying fighters’ behavior, and building social skills.

- Dark Samus has gotten electrocuted twice trying to fix the circuit breaker during power outages. Electricity doesn’t affect her as much as it would a human though, so she’s okay.

- During her first few weeks at the mansion, Dark Samus didn’t even bother to use doors. Instead, she just blasted her way through the walls and got in a lot of trouble for it.

- Due to her lack of social skills, she has stalker-like tendencies and doesn’t know what personal space is.

- She doesn't really feel much in terms of emotions, so social encounters are always super awkward. She read somewhere that people usually convey strong emotions through physical movements. So, when talking to the other fighters, she tries to do that, but it always ends up being really overexaggerated. For example, when she tries to show happiness, she does a small twirl in the air. Don't get her wrong, she's not doing this in the hope of making friends. She's doing this to gain emotional leverage over people. I think the only emotion she genuinely feels is anger.

- As mentioned before, she spends a lot of time learning about the world around her, but every so often, she gets bored. As much as she loves learning new information, Dark Samus needs to switch it up every now and then. So, she started learning how to do tricks with the Plasma Whip. It’s since become her new favorite thing.

- Isabelle, being the kind soul that she is, tried to teach Dark Samus how to hug. It seemed so innocent and wholesome, until poor Isabelle nearly got her spine crushed. The Phazon warrior didn’t care though, because now she knew another way to manipulate and kill someone.

- Sometimes, she just disappears inside the mansion and no one knows where she is or what she’s doing.

- She also has a habit of sneaking out of the mansion, using clones as stand-ins so nobody knows she’s gone.

- If Dark Samus somehow gets caught sneaking out, she’ll brainwash them into forgetting she was there.

- What the Phazon creature does outside of the mansion is unknown. She could be building a giant death laser, for all anybody knows. 

- The kids originally thought she was some sort of weird ghost, so they tried using Luigi’s Poltergust on her. To their shock and horror, it didn’t work.

- She and Ridley have the weirdest relationship. One minute, they’ll be terrorizing people together, then the next, they’ll be at each other’s throats.

- Dark Samus is easily one of the biggest threats to peace within the Smash universe. If the other villains want to start killing everybody, they’d make it known. But if Dark Samus wants to start killing everybody, nobody would realize until it was far too late.

- In fact, she could probably brainwash all of them into killing each other while she sits back with a bowl of popcorn, watching with genuine amusement for once in her life. Luckily, since Samus is her main target, that’s a thought she hasn’t considered. Not yet, anyway.

- She avoids water like the plague for some reason. If someone accidentally spills some on her, she’ll recoil, hiss like a cat, then just disappear down the hallway. It’s one of the strangest things she does, and that’s saying a lot.

- She frequently mimics Samus just to annoy her.

- When October comes around, Dark Samus does all the classic horror movie stuff just to scare the fighters. Someone will be in the bathroom, minding their own business, when all of a sudden, Dark Samus is just standing behind them in the mirror, completely still. She’ll hide in fighters’ closets when they think they’re alone and jump out when they least expect it. She’ll put spiders on people’s pillows, and leave footprints of fake blood around the mansion, and whisper to the fighters in creepy voices during the night. Not to mention, she’s been caught burning things outside several times. Nobody knows what she’s burning though, because no one dares to go near her.

 - On the topic of fire, this poison-given form has attempted arson countless times.

- She tried using the Beetle item as a spying device once, but quickly learned that it’s not made for stealth.

- For some reason, Dark Samus really likes Russian food. If there isn’t at least one Russian dish per week, she’ll start destroying valuable items.

- She’s super intelligent when it comes to combat and alien customs, but completely stupid when it comes to blending in amongst people.

- She bought an alien newt off the dark web. Everyone thinks it’s a pet, but she actually got it to spy on the other fighters. Samus finds it extremely unfair that Dark Samus can have a pet and she can’t. Ridley doesn’t like to eat amphibians, so there's no chance he'll go after the newt.

- When the hallway is too crowded for her liking, she gets into Ball Form and rolls through the vents. Lucas does not stop making Among Us jokes whenever she does it. 

- Dark Samus is the dark counterpart of Samus, so naturally, she hates everything that Samus likes.

- Dark Pit is the closest fighter she has to an actual friend. They bond over the few similarities they share, the biggest being that they're both dark counterparts. He’s the only fighter she would (maybe) spare if she tried to kill everyone in the mansion. She even allowed him to name her newt, which he decided to call Hades.

- Speaking of the dark angel, Dark Samus has brainwashed him a bunch of times just to indirectly make fun of Pit. He honestly doesn’t mind, considering he probably would’ve done that regardless.

- Samus and Solgaleo vs. Dark Samus and Lunala — easily one of their best matches of all time.

- Lunala is the only living creature within the Smash universe that Dark Samus has a faint fondness for (aside from Dark Pit, maybe). She’s always there to give it some extra Poke Beans during meal times.

- She teases Samus to no end. Snake is a big enemy of hers because of this.

- There are very few folks who will willingly go near Dark Samus. Even the other villains get a bad vibe from her. 

- Her favorite Song from the Smash soundtrack is Vs. Parasite Queen. To her, it sounds like something you can destroy an entire civilization to. Not that she plans on doing that… at least, not anytime soon…

Note: I hope you enjoyed all of these! Next up, the gluttonous egg dragon/dino!