[UNDER HEAVY REVISION] Super Smash Bros Ultimate Headcanons

Fighter #11 - Captain Falcon

- You know how some people name their weapons? Well, the gun strapped to his side is called Falcon. How original.

- Every time he smiles, everyone swears they can see his teeth sparkle.

- Captain Falcon is a big fan of Jurassic Park. He's not too keen on Jurassic World, though. He feels that it just doesn't have the same coolness as the older movies.

- If he ever decided to quit racing (which would definitely never happen), Cap definitely has the potential to become a pro swimmer. He's strong, has perfect form, and looks very elegant in the water.

- This dude totally wears a speedo to the pool, and it's simultaneously the most cursed and most awe-inspiring thing the fighters have ever seen. The veterans are used to it by now, as they've been around him for a while, but the newer fighters wish they could get their eyes bleached. And then there's Bayonetta, who seductively eyes him up and down the whole time. Whether she's just teasing or she actually feels attracted to him, nobody knows.

- No matter how many times he's ridden the Blue Falcon, Cap never gets tired of doing donuts with it.

- He will happily take the kids for joyrides, as long as they agree to keep their seatbelts on and take proper precautions. Safety is Cap's number one priority, especially when it comes to the younger fighters.

- Speaking of which, he is amazing with kids. He always knows exactly how to hype them up and put smiles on their faces.

- Whether he's at a race or in the middle of a fight, Cap will definitely show off in front of the audience. It's not a traditional Captain Falcon event if he doesn't wink or salute at least once.

- If there's a bug in the mansion, he's usually the first one asked to remove it. Usually, he doesn't mind, but if he has to deal with a moth, it becomes a big issue. For whatever reason, Cap hates moths. One time, Wendy asked him to take a moth out of her room and he reluctantly agreed. Cap hilariously tried to guide the moth into a glass cup, trying not to show that he was scared of it. Unfortunately for him, the way his arms were hyper-extended while his head was tilted back as far as possible made it painfully obvious.

- Cap can't handle spicy stuff very well and gets pretty bad stomach aches if he has anything with peppers in it. The hottest thing he can handle without having any problems is a dab of hot sauce-that's it.

- For a guy who seems so lively and outgoing, he doesn't really speak about his past. Only Mario knows the whole story, as he's Cap's most trusted friend. Bowser Jr. theorizes that he used to be a superhero that got kicked out of some super secret hero league.

- Falco originally thought that the Blue Falcon was a cool spaceship and wanted one just like it. When he found out it was actually meant for racing, that only made him want it even more.

- Cap is extremely helpful. Whether someone seeks good advice or just needs help opening the pickle jar, he's the guy to turn to.

- The kids trust him a lot. He's like a really cool father figure to them.

- He believes socks are criminally underrated and doesn't understand why anyone would be sad about receiving them for a special occasion.

- He and Lucario often have intense sparring sessions. There's no bad blood between them; they just enjoy giving it their all and they can trust each other with going full force. One time, their match got so heated that they crashed Peach, Daisy, and Zelda's tea party, breaking the table and all of the cups with it. Enraged, the princesses forced them to clean up the mess.

- Cap will often join Ness and Snake when they watch baseball games. If his favorite team wins, he gets super excited (a little too excited, if you ask Snake).

- All of his racing trophies are put on display in his room.

- Due to his popularity, he frequently has to avoid paparazzi in his world. He doesn't mind it too much, but whenever he returns to Smash, he finds himself to be more relaxed because he knows they can't follow him there.

- In the back of his mind, Cap worries that Blood Falcon is going to hunt him down at some point. He knows he can fight him off, but he doesn't want anything bad to happen to any of the other fighters. If one of the kids got hurt because of him, he wouldn't be able to live with himself.

- When the Koopalings are bored, he'll play Duck Duck Goose with them. Hey, whatever distracts them from pulling pranks on the other fighters. As long as it keeps the peace, Cap doesn't mind at all. In fact, he enjoys hanging out with the Koopalings and thinks they're actually really sweet when they're not being mischievous.

- The suit that he usually wears is actually the same one that he wore in his younger years; the color just faded from blue to indigo over time. Because it's his original suit, the one he wore during many exciting races in the past, it holds a lot of sentimental value. He hates the thought of getting rid of it and replacing it with a new one, but at the same time, he sort of misses the original blue color. To make him feel better, the fighters got him a new navy blue suit for his birthday, custom made to look just like the old one. That way, he could have the color he wanted without getting rid of his original suit. Cap was so touched by the heartfelt gesture that he genuinely started tearing up.

- He lets Wendy practice doing makeup on him, and he always looks like a pretty princess when she's done.

- Cap's actually a really good artist. Lemmy asks him to draw stuff all the time.

- He tries his best to keep the kids away from Ridley, Ganondorf, Dark Samus, Sephiroth, Kazuya, King K. Rool, and Wolf because he thinks they're all bad influences.

- However, Bowser, Meta Knight, and King Dedede are trusted individuals. He knows they aren't completely evil and believes it's not too late for them to turn their lives around (which, for the most part, they already have). Plus, Bowser is the Koopalings' father, and he's already proven that he's a good dad.

- Wario is a big 'if'. Sometimes, he seems trustworthy and fun to be around, but other times, he can be a big jerk. When Cap found out about the baseball card incident, he wouldn't let Wario talk to Ness for days. He always reminds the kids to be careful around Wario; if he asks for money, don't give it to him.

- Halloween is his favorite holiday, and he goes all out for it every year. Once, he went as the Grim Reaper and was nearly hit by three separate cars because it was pitch-black out and no one could see him.

- Flying-type Pokemon are his favorite, especially Talonflame. Talonflame is his buddy.

- He really wants to join the Mario Kart races but knows that the Blue Falcon would be too overpowered.

- If Doc needs a break, he'll hold mitts for Little Mac.

- Ganondorf is his biggest rival. They can not be in the same room with each other for five seconds without making an unfriendly competition out of nothing. It's really difficult for them to see eye-to-eye and they fight very frequently.

- Pit used to believe Cap was some sort of fiery falcon god that he'd never met before.

- In his younger years, before he got into racing, Cap considered joining a motorcycle gang. Hylia knows what that could've led to.

- His favorite song from the Smash soundtrack is Mute City [Wii U/3DS]. He, Ness, Lucas, and Villager always get into debates over which Mute City is the best one. Ness likes the original the most, Lucas argues that Melee is the best, and Villager prefers the Brawl version. However, no matter what anyone says, Cap will always stick with the Wii U/3DS version because it fills him with a rush of adrenaline that he can't get from any other song.