Concrete hell

Chapter 12

Tw ⚠️ : talk if sh / ed all chapter

Atsushi's pov :
There a loud knock at his door Making him jump up .
Getting pulled back down by the weight on his chest , looking down seeing akutagawa curled up around him .
"Atsushi , it's chuuya is Ryu awake?"
"No "
"Ok when he is tell him to come downstairs "
"Ok"

Chuuya walked downstairs and akutagawa woke up because his alarm was going off .
"chuuya said you need to go downstairs "
Akutagawa rubbed his eyes and nodded leaving the room .

Atsushi sat there Letting all his thoughts take over that today he has to talk to dazai .

Akutagawas came back and started getting dressed for school .
Reminding Atsushi that he's not going .
"Your gonna be fine jinko , this is only going to help things get better "
"Ok "
"I's later than I thought and I have to walk so I'm going now "
"Why walk ?"
"Chuuyas at work and I'm assuming dazais gonna stay here and talk to you "
"If you ask he'll take you "
"No it's fine, I'm gonna go now see you later "
"Ok bye "

Akutagawa left him soon hearing the front door open and close .
'i thought chuuya was here a second ago ?'
"Atsushi come downstairs please "
His heart stopped , it was dazai.

Knowing he can't avoid this he walked downstairs , chuuya then walked through the door .
"I I thought you were at work ?"
"I was but they didn't need me today , did Ryu walk ?"
"Yeah , but sounded like he wanted to "
"Ok thanks"

Dazai called him over and he sat opposite of him on the couch .

He didn't look at him as he's so scared .
"Atsushi I'm gonna be honest that I don't even know where to start with this right now , why did you do this ?"
"I don't know "
"You have to give me more than that "
"I was sad "
"Why ?"
"Because people were being mean to me "
"Ok and you didn't tell me because ?"
"I didn't know how to bring it up so I never did "
"Are they still bothering you ?"
"Not as much , akutagawa scared them off "
Dazai took a deep breath.
"Can you show me ?"
He shook his head.
"Why the hell not ?"
"Osamu calm down "
Chuuya sat next to dazai .
"Atsushi is there a reason you don't want to show dazai ?"
"I - I don't want to scare you "

He began to cry even though he promised himself he wouldn't .
"Atsushi I've seen some proper scary things I think I'll be alright - but if you don't want to we'll do that another time . When was the last time you done it ?"
He sat there silently .
"Atsushi tell me now "
"Yesterday , I'm sorry I really am "
"If you were sorry you wouldn't do it would you -"
"Osamu stop , Atsushi you can go to your room "

Atsushi ran upstairs but couldn't hear them yelling Through the walls .

"So your just gonna tell him what to do now are you ?"
"No that's not what I'm doing Osamu "
"Yes it is chuuya , your basically doing my job for me "
"Because you were scaring him Osama , he is struggling and it hurts me that you can't see that "
"You don't thi k I can't see that ? He's so secretive it's not my fault !"
"Because you act like this Osamu , you really need to understand that this has nothing to do with you personally so stop feelings sorry for yours and take a look at him , he needs your help more than ever right now and you belittling him isn't going to help !"

The fighting stopped , the front door slammed shut and dazais name being called out.
'this is my fault , they were fighting because if me '
He starts shaking and crying uncontrollably .
Breathing getting harder to do .
Eyes being crystaled over with tears .

"Atsushi he'll be back later - are you ok ?"
He shakes his head and holds his chest .
Chuuya sits next to him on the floor .
"Take a deep breath in , and out , that's it good job "
He was slowly calming down .
"This isn't your fault , dazai just finds it hard to talk about emotions "