My Beautiful Boy ✔️

13

It's a new day. I feel as if my conversation with Dawson had given me a new perspective on him. I now know that there's more to him than meets the eye, and I would love to be the one to peel away the layers of Dawson Anderson and find what lays in the centre.

I sat in my business class, not able to concentrate on my work. My pen was limp in my hand and the exercise book in front of me had a few words written on the top of the page. Me and Dawson stayed up late last night and we watched a few movies. I kicked him out just before my parents got home from their trip, and it feels weird to sneak around them and keep secrets from them.

My parents and I don't have any secrets. I tell my mother everything and it feels like I'm betraying them by having a boy in the house. I'm sure they'd be fine with it, but I can never be too sure.

Then, when the lesson was finished, I sat in the canteen, the bustle of the many crowds around me sent a sharp pain through my head. I move my hair onto one shoulder and Leilana rests her head on the other, closing her eyes.

"I'm so tired." She mumbled, and I realised that being a stripper is something that one's with the faintest of hearts cannot do. Leilana is a strong woman. Ever since I met her two years ago, I've never seen her in a position of weakness or vulnerability.

"You should have gotten some rest instead of coming to college." I tell her, patting the top of her head. Leilana looks up at me and I grin at her. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"You're wearing makeup." She stated, and I feel my cheeks tint red under the foundation I wore. "Hmm. To impress a certain someone, I assume?"

"What? Of course not. I was just- I was just experimenting." I tell her, looking away. If I was able to look her in the eyes, she'd be able to see I was lying. I was wearing makeup, which was a very rare occasion, because I know that Dawson is going to see me today. It was a stupid idea, I know. What happened to women wearing makeup because they wanted to? I'm such a let down to my gender.

"You, Alayna, experiment in your bedroom at midnight. Not before college." She correctly assumed, and I cleared my throat, looking away. I don't want Leilana knowing about Dawson. He's someone that I can keep to myself and I don't want to change that.

"It makes me feel good about myself." I tell her, a small smile on my face. "And... Maybe, I might have worn it for someone other than myself." I said, shrugging my shoulders.

Leilana gasps dramatically, slapping my arm. "I knew it! You like him, don't you?" She asked, and I shrugged my shoulders again.

"No, I don't- I don't know. I... He's good looking." I tell her, and she's grinning at me. I rolled my eyes and held my chin in my hands. "He's an intriguing person." I say, and Leilana hums from beside me.

"Go for it." She said, and I sigh, knowing that I most definitely will not be going for it.

***

Dawson's eyes land on me as I walk over to the alleyway, his mouth parting slightly. I was in the middle of tying my hair up and I smiled slightly at him as he cleared his throat, rubbing his finger over his nose.

"You look... different." He told me, not making eye contact. I made it next to him and we began our walk to his house. "Like, a good difference. But- I mean, you looked good before, it's just that- you look- you look nice." He scratches the back of his neck and I chuckle at his shyness. Dawson is obviously a very quiet person who doesn't really voice his opinion, so it's nice to know that he thinks I look good. Not that I seek his validation, or anything.

"Thank you." I grin, and I see the small smile peeking from the side of his face, covered slightly by the side of his hood. "You should show your hair more." I blurted out, before I bit my lip in regret. Dawson glances at me as we exit the alleyway and turn. "As in... you have nice hair." I said, digging myself deeper into the hole I dug for myself.

"It's not my hair that I'm hiding." He mumbles, crossing his arms over his chest. "It's my face. People would ask me what's wrong if they saw even half the bruises I have." He stated.

Because I was feeling cute and spontaneous, I stopped our walking by placing a hand on his arm and raising the fingers of my other hand to his chin, gently lowering it so that I can get a clear view of his face. Especially with the sun shining down on us, it's easier to get a better look at his bruises. Dawson freezes under my touch, his eyes wide and staring directly into mine. I think I'm blinded by the blue.

I watch as he slowly exhales, and my fingers sizzle on his skin as I examine the few yellow-coloured bruises remaining on his skin. His eyes flicker all around my face and my thumb accidentally rubs across his bottom lip, causing him to part them slightly.

Then, I'm staring right at his lips. They were the perfect size. Not too big and not too small. They looked soft and very, very kissable.

I quickly move my hand away from him, stepping to the side so that we can continue walking. "Erm- they're healing well." I cleared my throat, pressing a hand to my chest. My heart is beating rapidly. Is that normal? "That's good." I added.

Dawson is insanely quiet on the rest of the walk home, and even though he invited me in, I told him I had to get home. I didn't have to, but I was too scared to spend more time in his presence than necessary.

So, after politely declining his offer, I rushed home, crawled under my covers and fell asleep.