his girls (Charles Leclerc)

sixteen

December 25th

I sighed, opening the front door for him to come in "You know you don't have to do this for us.. you should go to the family lunch."

He was skipping Christmas dinner with his family for us.

He shook his head, stepping into the living room "No, I want to do this too, I'd rather be with you two than all of them."

I smiled at him, since being in Monaco I've found life more complicated for sure but also more smiley, "She is going to be really happy to see you, she always is."

"I'm quite a hit with the Gasly girls." He chuckled as we waited for her to come down the stairs so we could go, I'd since told Charles about her request to meet her daddy and he had an idea to fulfil it for her.

"Merry Christmas Charles!" She squealed running to his arms as she always did, him crouching down to her level, "You seem very happy today.. did someone happen to get the tangled toys they wanted?"

She nodded up and down, running to go and show him the toys she had opened early this morning, six this morning to be exact, there was nothing I could do to get her to sleep, once she was up, she was up.

"Santa got you a lot didn't he?" Charles asked her as he addressed the sight of the house, wrapping paper everywhere, the Christmas tree  brightly shining and the cookies for Santa eaten.

"Yup, I was scared I'd get coal!" She squealed.

"I actually have a present for you Camila," Charles told her rushing out to his car and bringing a massive box out, "From me, not Santa this time."

Camila walked up to him, he crouched down again to put it on the floor as she wouldn't manage to grab it from his height or even carry it , I didn't know he got her a gift.

She was tearing the wrapping paper off instantly unsure to what it would be underneath,"Okay you have to be careful though okay?" Charles said as the was still opening it.

"Thank you thank you thank you!" She screamed jumping around and hugging him tightly, her little hands around his neck, "Wait what is it?" I asked a little confused, all I could see was a clear sort of tank?

Camila turned around to face me "Pascale!"

He damn went and got her a chameleon.

I looked down closer, "You did not." I could see the little chameleon now, he was blending in to one of the rocks in the bottom of the terrarium, an abundance of rocks, grass and sticks in it.

I chuckled to myself, asking a very excited Camila  "Well, she'll look forward to feeding it bugs won't you?"

She made a disgusted face but continued to press her face up to the glass of the inclosure which would inevitably end up in her bedroom and I will end up feeding it and cleaning it out no doubt, "Thank you Charles." She said once again, keeping her entire focus on the animal.

"Well Mon Cheri, we can come and play with him later we are going to do something very special." I told her, grabbing her hand and pulling her from the floor to stand her up, Charles lifted the enclosure from the floor and placed it on the table.

She looked up, confused "Where are we going mummy?"

I smiled at her, lifting her up and holding her close "You know you wanted to meet daddy, and I told you that we can't really see him? There's something else we can do instead."
———————-

Charles gave me a small smile, rubbing his hand up my arm as I spoke to Camila, "This is where you can come too whenever you're missing him."

She looked up again, confused "Why?"

The concept of death is very hard to explain to a child in a gentle way, expressing that they aren't physically with us but emotionally they can be, "Well when people pass away, to show your respect to that person they often get buried and we can then go and visit them, talk to them."

We walked closer to the gravestone, I hadn't visited it since the funeral and honestly I never intended on coming back, "So daddy is here and when we come here we can talk to him?"

I nodded at her, "Yeah."

Charles began to speak, "I come here all the time, your daddy was my best friend so I tell him everything, I think he would've liked the chameleon idea, he's known about that for two weeks." 

my heart.

Camila smiled at him, wandering over to the grave labelled 'Pierre Gasly, driver, son, brother and fiancé' sitting down in front of it, ready to tell him about all sorts of things going on in her life.

Charles and I stood back, not far away enough that we couldn't see her but far enough away that we couldn't actually hear what she was saying, she deserved some privacy to talk to her dad.

I whispered to him quietly, his hand remained in mine comfortably "I didn't know you were getting her a pet."

"She's hard to buy for, I've been thinking about Christmas presents for weeks. Pascale was the only thing that came to mind."

I chuckled a bit, "You know I'm going to make you feed it the nasty locusts.. I'm sure as hell not doing that and she won't either."

He held his hands up, "Look I've done my part in buying it, you guys have the responsibility now."

"So is that my Christmas present hm?," my eyes scanned his pausing, "Responsibility?"

He knew he had no right to touch her, crave her like air, but he did both. And when he put his mouth to hers, he recognised the taste of her, like she'd been made just for him.

"I hope you know Juliette," he murmured stroking a hand down the long line of my hair. "I do love you. It's never gonna be enough, but it's as much as I've got to give in me, yeah?"

He paused sensing perhaps how deeply his words scored through me, "But it's more than anyone else in the whole world, okay?"

"Okay."