Guardian Angel

Chapter Three

Chapter Three

"I don't want to be here."

I glanced sideways at my father, who stood anxiously by the exit, eyeballing that neon exit sign that was a constant reminder he could just leave if it was too much for him. However, I had specific instructions from dad that father had to stay here and support Hades. He was adamant we stay until he arrived from running an errand.

It was just a few years after I had graduated. The next step was to apply for my doctorate, but I was choking up last minute, which was stressing out the family, so it made sense that Rowan was already on edge. When things didn't go according to plan, he tended to start freaking out and needed to get back home.

I knew why he freaked out. I knew why he blamed himself for things that literally had nothing to do with him. He'd been in therapy for a while, but apparently one incident had made everything collapse and while most of the time Rowan had good days, his lows were long and suffering and there wasn't much we could do aside from support him when he needed it. He refused to talk to Joxeia, and dad said it had something to do with being embarrassed.

"You said you wanted to support Hades," I said, turning to Rowan when he looked helplessly at the door again, "That's what we're doing. He'll be out any second to pass out the awards. It won't be more than ten more minutes, fifteen tops. Please." I was hitting puberty by this point. My world was my world and my father was nothing more than an obstacle in it. I couldn't believe he wanted to bail now of all times. And we both knew how it would end; Rowan would run home and then beat himself up for not sticking around, which would result in another episode of shutting himself in the house for days on end. I was young and I was tired and the hormonal imbalance was high and I could honestly just make excuses all day, but it came right down to being a selfish asshole.

I wanted to go home and smoke. I wanted to get online and hunt for jobs, because when it came right down to it, computers were far more appealing than anything in the medical field. But if I spoke out of turn, I knew Hades and Rowan would be crushed. Hades was thrilled to have someone who understood his lingo. Rowan was excited because it meant more opportunities in the work force and in the battlefield.

Instead, I was stuck babysitting my depression riddled dad.

"He's not going to want to see me," Rowan muttered, his eyes glued to the area of the stage where Hades was going to come from, "Not after what happened. I shouldn't have..." He was mumbling so quietly I couldn't hear him now and I didn't care to listen to his ramblings, so I turned away just in time to see Hades emerge from the curtains and a round of applause echoed through the dining hall.

I threw my hands up and clapped, pausing to elbow my father in the ribs in the process. He just flinched away from me and kept his eyes downcast, but I did see him peer up for just a second.

I remember a vicious streak of annoyance cutting through me.

What the hell was wrong with him that he couldn't just be supportive for one second? Why was he always thinking of himself? Why did he always have to be such a drama queen when the moment was supposed to belong to someone else? Hades needed him and all Rowan could do was think about himself.

I ignored Rowan for the rest of the event. I didn't trust myself to speak and dad had always been very adamant that I watch what I say to him in anger.

"You don't understand right now," dad said, a year earlier, "Your father's going through a lot, has gone through a lot, and he's coping the only way he knows how and that's to hide. But we should be very proud that he hasn't left."

"Left?" I had asked.

"I," dad had paused, like he wasn't sure if he wanted to continue and I glared at him, catching his eye and he sighed in frustration, "Ryk, it doesn't have anything to do with us personally, alright? I want you to understand that. This is something Ryk has lived with his entire life, a constant fear."