I wake up still cuddled bewteen them, all of us naked. I can't believe that happened. Blushing as memories from last night slip in. Truly something pleasing about it all and very enjoyable. A shudder takes hold, and I wiggle bewteen them.
I can feel them close against me, perfectly holding us together. Feeling both their members rising for another round I take my leave instanly. No way could I do that again so soon. Two at once is super draining even when taking turns.
I run my hand gingerly over the marks along my neck. Haiji already expecting me, I materialize back in my room at the Manor. I look to see him giving me a knowing gaze from the bottom of the bed, like he wants to ask a question.
"Think before you speak Haiji. It is complicated but I have everything under control.... mostly ok..."
He rolls his eyes, "Of course Master."
"Listen you cat-"
I hear a knock at the door, "Yuki, dear. It is mother."
"Come in, I'm just dressing." I slip on a pair of shorts and a long purple sun dress.
"I just wanted to to say..." She takes a deep breath, "I just love you both soo much-"
"I understand. Truly. Say no more." I smile and continue to get ready.
She leaves me to my buisness. Sighing I pin up my hair today and ready to go to face Chrollo for my answers. I have so many questions, he will be honest with me.
I cut Hisoka's and Illumi's connection off before leaving, still annoyed by the fact Hisoka went against me for Illumi. I roll my eyes, warning Haiji I want zero interruptions. He nods and leaves instantly.
I focus only on Chrollo and blink to his side, instantly I feel his arms touch mine. I kick out my wings and float above him with a smirk. Seeing the smile on his face I slowly drift in to his embrace, pleased by his welcoming glow. I bring my lips to his and kiss him deeply, emotions trembling in them.
He pulls back and looks forward, past me, "The Wings have arrived, rejoice Spiders we are complete!" I hear them all cheer, shocking me in to my surroundings.
I look around and see the Troupe nearly complete, "I am pleased to be a part of the Spider Family."
I motion Chrollo to set me down, I feel the shutter ripple as I release my Zetsu. I stand boldy next to Chrollo, my wings stretched fully out behind us, "I am Yukinaru, call me Yuki. I have my own special traits some of you have seen previously."
I giggle feeling Chrollo's excitement next to me, "What mischief are we going to get in to now Chrollo?"
I hear an intake of shocked breath and I look around confused, "My friends all call me Boss or Leader, but it's refreshing to have you call me as you wish Naru."
"Well then Boss..." I trail off, "No I tried. I can not," I turn to the Troupe, "I did try. He is always gonna be just Chrollo to me."
I hear them collectively laugh. Machi speaking up first, "It fits better. Sounds silly hearing you call Boss, boss."
"Indeed. I did not care for it much." Chrollo says calmly. "Spiders go, you know what each must do. Meet again here in a year's time."
He turns and takes me into his arms once more, my wings retracting instantly with his touch. I watch him closely, pleased everyone is leaving us. I want to talk openly with Chrollo. I adjust in his arms, getting settled into his grip.
He smiles at me, "I have a place I want to bring you." He pulls me closer, "Hold tight now."
I rest my head against his chest, smiling at the rhythm of his heart beat. I feel his aura suddenly, one of his hands letting me go. The church melts away and before my eyes appear the most exquisite flowers.
He lays me down on a bed of dark blue flowers. Their petals are long and light purple streaks down the center of each one. They sit attached to silk like vines, weaving tightly together.
They cover everything in sight, nothing is seen beneath the green webs of vines. I smile my wings starting to flutter, Chrollo stands over me.
"What are these?" I carefully stand, "Are we in a tree?" I look around at the endless walls of flowers that trail in all directions.
"We are. These are purple spider lilies. They engulf everything around them." He smiles tentatively as he pulls me down to the ground with him.
Flowers drifting down from above, land lightly in my hair. The fragrance so entrancing I feel my composure slipping. I can't help it, I let go of Chrollo's hand and run freely around.
I dance amongst the flower trees and giggle, feeling so happy. A beautiful sight to a broken soul. The breeze lightly swirling petals all around, creating a sense of serenity.
"This is a special place I come too every so often." Chrollo catches up quickly beside me, "I find beauty here and hope perhaps maybe my thoughts will be easier to shift through." I look around at him, surprise to see him opening up.
"Truly are you opening up or after something else?" I question him, darkly suspicious.
"Both, you are apart of the Spider. I am the head, the Troupe the legs. You are the wings. The legs can regrow but the wings are forever more. You are a part of me now. Who better then to share my thoughts with if not you?" He trails his hand lightly down my cheek, no hesitation.
"Just who are you Chrollo Lucilfer?" I keep my tone light and thoughtful.
"I am just me Naru as I said, and the Spider is also me." He seems honest enough right now.
I stop running and let myself fall backwards. Looking up at the sky of flowers, I feel Chrollo come to sit next to my head.
"I was taught is that one can only grow with the experiences they survive and explore. The more someone accumulates then the more knowledge they have. Win, lose, die or live. All of these things are experiences. The only way to get stronger is to overcome them." I laugh at the look on concentration he has.
"So experience is what gives you your strength?" His tone is sharp and laced with silent annoyance.
"Well I mean I don't have many but I have instincts of sorts.. almost like muscle memory.." I trail off and revert back to my question, "What about you Chrollo?"
"I can not answer your questions. I don't know many of the answers. I feel loss and joy at things. Some moments pleasant, some bad.." He chuckles softly, "I have no real purpose other then keeping the Spider alive if that helps, the purpose."
"Then what exactly is the Spider and your goal?" I roll to my side and face him.
"We are a world-renowned gang of thieves with Class-A Bounties. Many of us hail form Meteor City. We don't have a true purpose other then to remain free and fill our own desires." I look hoping for more of an explanation.
"Meteor City is an outcast part of the world. Everything unwanted or forgotten lands there."
"That seems like an interesting waste land." I smile understanding that he grew up harshly as well, "And the spider?"
Chuckling he continues, "The head is myself and my orders are to be considered the utmost priority but my life is not, since even the head can be replaced."
"No, I have beheaded spiders before. They don't grow back I can assure you." I interrupt him quickly.
"Be that as it may, let me continue." Chrollo pats the top of my head, "The legs are the individual members of the Troupe. They are expected to adhere to the governing principle that the prosperity of the group as a whole trumps the survival of any one of its legs." He lets out a long sigh and looks up at the flowers.
"So you see them as replaceable?"
"Yes and no. When a spider dies it feels as if apart of myself dies with them." I study his expressions intently.
"Truly you care for them but you don't know why?" I reach, sitting up and touch his cheek.
"It seems to be far more complicated then that as of lately. My Troupe has come to be so reliant on me that my life is now elevated to the status of priority for the Troupe." He lays down on the bed of flowers, crossing his arm behind his head.
"Well the spiders may be a wild bunch of twisted individuals Chrollo, but it stands to reason you are the only reason they even have something a kin to a family. It would make sense they want you to live over their own life. Sure they may follow the rules of the Troupe but in the end it's only because of you." I laugh as I look at his confused face, "Silly powerful man. Is it so hard to believe that someone could care for you?"
"I don't even know me. Truly I do not know why I am here or what my purpose is." Chrollo shrugs, "My goal is to discover my true reason for my existence. I am ment for something more and I will go beyond the boundaries to find it."
"If you are lost trying to even find yourself, then what hope do I have?" I look away from him, "At least you know relatively who you are by living through your spiders. Me? Not so much. I'm completely alone in the entirety of this world, no one else like me." I roll my back to him not wanting to face him as I speak openly.
"I may have many different sides to me but I don't know how much is me and how much was forced to be. I spent tireless nights having one way conversations with the moon about my own existence. I'm not human, I'm not a demon. I'm not a Zarin anymore, I am not a Zoldyck either. I'm alone, completely and entirely alone."
I feel Haiji materializing next me, "Well almost completely alone." Giggling I pet his head, he always knows.
I stop and think back on my uncle, I think he told me a story once. Maybe it could help Chrollo a bit. I look over at him and see him silently watching me.
"Uncle told me a story once about when he learned something new. Perhaps it may help you." I look at him with an unspoken question.
"Please, I wish to listen more to your voice." He sits and pulls me on his lap, pulling out a book he motions me to continue.
"Hmmmm I don't know Chrollo," I giggle teasing him lightly, "It is an odd story he told me long ago. He was merely a young one himself." I smile excitedly remembering my uncle.
"Do not tease me with knowledge Naru," he kisses me and urges me on.
"Grandfather Zarin was appointing a new head for the family. My Uncle and.. Kenji.. were raised for the sole purpose of leading the family. That was my Uncle's sole purpose for existing at that time." I sigh remembering the past, Haiji nudging me out of it.
"Anyway, it was merely their 300th cycle and Grandfather had his sons fight, the winner leads the family. The fight was brutal from the way my uncle described it, I dare not repeat. By the end of it though, Uncle couldn't bring himself to truly hurt his younger brother and lost. Not only did he lose his purpose but became an outcast till Kaijiru was born to Kenji, the eldest of /my/ siblings." I giggle feeling the intensity of Chrollo's gaze.
"For over a hundred cycles Renji roamed the homeland, just fighting trying to find some meaning. He said it was dark times then, that he himself was just dark. That was till Kenji summoned him to raise the new Zarin."
I can see the question in Chrollo's eyes, before he even ask I answer, "Kaijiru's mother was a mortal Renji abducted from a trespassing group and died during birth." I roll my eyes at the thought of how weak normal humans are.
Returning to my gaze to Chrollo I continue, "Having something to look after gave my Uncle a sense of purpose. He said that holding that little babe gave him a new strength." I smile feeling the warmth wrapping around me, Chrollo's aura swallowing me.
"Uncle says that sometimes your true purpose won't be found till you reach your lowest low. That's when your existence will have meaning." I feel him burning with more questions but some satisfaction shown on his lips.
"So in the case of my compassion filled Uncle, it was protecting others. He was ment to be a leader but denied because of his kindness. Thanks to losing his original purpose he found his true one."
"To find something, first one must walk alone a path of darkness?" He questions curiously in my ear.
"I don't know, I don't understand what he was trying to tell me in that story. I just figured it may help you at least." I pull away from him and stand up. "I have a different thoughts personally. I don't think like either of you. I believe you are wasting time looking for a purpose. We all exist without knowing why. We eat, we kill, some thrive some fail, but in the end it's all pointless and worthless. The only thing of value is to be useful in someway. Many live lost and die worthless."
"You view yourself as worthless then?" Chrollo questions me trying to understand.
"You have your Troupe and set goals. Hisoka has his toys and own ambitions. Illumi has his family and his work he enjoys deeply. Looping back to me, I truly have no place in this world."
I feel myself darkening, "My existence is even far more pointless then yours Chrollo.. Truly what value does my life hold?"
When he remains silent I continue talking, "How can I describe this feeling when I barely understand it..." I think deeply, Chrollo patiently waiting.
"It is as if I am a wordless book Chrollo. Exchanging hands but never knowing my own story. My pages remaining empty under my gaze." I stretch out my wings, "I have less of a reason to exist then even that. I was made for one reason and no longer do I have that. That darkness my uncle spoke of is indeed all consuming." I feel so stupid right now, speaking so openly to another person.
"The two of us being here together like this.. I'd be thrilled if this is what Destiny is." Chrollo steps closer to me,
"Your life here is your book and I do enjoy the story you provide. You have a purpose, you are a treasure gifted to me from the Dark Continent. Riddled with knowledge and power. Deep in to the lore of prophecy, woven in the fabric of time. Yukinaru your only purpose right now is to shine brightly for me."
"You're so silly Chrollo and I do believe this is the most either one of us have ever been so open." I smile and lean my back into him.
"Yukinaru, you have a strange effect on me as well." He chuckles reaching out a hand to my side "What do you say Naru? Want to walk a path by my side?"
I reach for Chrollo's hand, there is still so much I can learn. Being by his side will aid in my own experiences if I think about it.
"For now Chrollo." I stand and take his hand my excitement building.
The sound of my story's pages are starting to turn. Like so many echoing foot steps before me, I walk ever forward.
YOU ARE READING
Wings and Webs: Journey
Fanfiction~ A new Hunter comes from the Dark Continent to grow and learn to live in the known world. Will she be able to over come the raging storm or be left to drown in her own madness. The laughs of a Jester can be heard from the shadows, a Spider b...
