Placebo || 3Racha ✔️

18

I gasp quietly, a headache right by my side, hitting me over and over again. I whimper, trying to feel around without having to open my eyes. It's a bed. Just our bed.

"Changbin?" Someone whispers. They brush my hair with their hand. I don't mean to flinch, but I do anyway.

I slowly open my eyes. Gravity didn't want me to. I glance to the side, barely moving an inch. Chan is with me. How surprising.

"What happened?"

"You passed out."

"What?" That wakes me up a bit more. I try sitting up, but his pushes me back down.

"Don't. Just relax. You came home today and you... you looked absolutely terrified. I don't know what caused you to look like that, but I don't really want to either. You looked at us and fell right into a panic attack. That's what Jisung said at least. He would know."

I take in the information, beginning to remember. Oh, no. The note. It was in my car. I sit up quickly, standing from the bed. Almost as soon as I stood, my knees buckled. I barely catch myself from hitting my head on the floor.

"Fucking hell, Bin." Chan quickly helps me up, forcing me back into bed. "What did I just say? Relax. You shouldn't be moving so much. What's the matter?"

My throat was clogged. I shake my head, grabbing at it when the headache pounded behind my eyes. I know everything hates me right now. I know that. But honestly, nothing could hate me more than I hate myself in this moment and possibly moments to come.

"I'll tell Jisung to get some pain medication. Breathe, okay? In and out."

I lay my head back against the wall, closing my eyes. So much was happening that I couldn't keep up. I wanted to cuddle into Chan, I wanted to get rid of this headache, I wanted to see if the note was still there or see if they found it.

I start crying. I hide my face, trying to make myself as small as I could. There was an array of emotions hitting me all at once.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." I repeat it over and over again. No matter how much I say it, it doesn't make me feel any less guilty.

He pulls me into his arms, trying to comfort me. He shouldn't be trying. I was so nasty to them. I didn't deserve them one bit. I don't know how he could even stand being in the same room as me.

Soon, I fall asleep once again.