wish list | daerin

❛ Rest Assured ❜

⌗ 14
Mason ✎ᝰ
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The last week has felt like a fever dream. I can't seem to get it out of my head that this is just a dream I haven't woken up from. I think about it long and hard—it's real. I know it is. It has to be. I feel you cup my face with your hands.

"Baby, are you thinking about it again?"

Her voice sounds so pretty, as it always does. And hearing it first thing in the morning makes me feel like I'm ready to take on anything.

You kiss my forehead gently. Pulling away, with a smile on your face. "I told you, it's all real, love."

I've been quite anxious these last few days. Ever since the night of The Celestial. I can't help but wonder that I'm lacking in some way. This is all so new to me—and I have no idea what I'm doing.

This is my first relationship. I don't how to act. What are the rules? Are there implications? How do I act in certain situations? I have so many questions. I feel like there should be a crash course on romance but here I am.

I lay quietly. You're looking at me like you're afraid I'd vanish. I might do just that...the way she looks at me will have me melting into a puddle of nothingness, and then proceed to evaporate into thin air. 

"I might melt if you continue to look at me like that," I spoke gently. "Gosh, your eyes..."

"Mm, what about them my love?" She moves the hair that blocks the corner of my eye, tucking it behind my ear. "Is there something in my eye?"

I shake my head. "No," I chuckle. "I just find them so pretty. I know I tell you all the time. But I really can't go a day without telling you."

Riley's cheeks flush. "Oh, stop it."

I smile widely. "Thank you for staying last night." I bury my head between the crook of her neck. She's my safe place—through and through.

Riley rubs the small of my back, "You were so worried about us," She said. "I wouldn't leave even if you told me to. I wanna make sure you feel seen. You're doing really great, my love."

We spent most of last night studying on my bedroom floor. The last week had been anything but studious—it was time to get the word done.

It was only till I had gone online that I started to feel unconscious about myself. I started wondering if I lacked anything greatly. After all, I've never been in a relationship. I don't know anything about dating. Or how to be a girlfriend.

I cried in front of her. It was both sad and humiliating—especially for that reason in particular. It's my first relationship and I felt like I was doing terribly. I felt bad.

"Why do you think you're lacking?" Riley furrowed her brows. "Is that what you really think?" She asked me.

I hang my head low. It was bad enough that I was worrying so much about it. Now I'm sitting on my bedroom floor in tears over a matter that I never knew I'd be upset over.

"This is so embarrassing..." I sobbed loudly.

Riley pushes away our things and pulls me closer. "There's nothing to be embarrassed about." She replied. Her warm embrace is comforting, as it always is. It's home.