The Spook Origins

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Never in my life have I been happy about taking the bus. After our break into Alchemax, sitting on a bus for over an hour sounded like a great idea. Thankfully the pain in my hand wasn't as bad now. Really need to get it checked out when we get back into New York. The others were sitting in the back while I sat a little ways up. Wanted to hopefully get some rest after our fight. That plan like the last one went down in flames.

"Hey"

"*sigh* look I'm too tired for this Gwen. I need my rest", I said, really too tired to deal with this. Looking up at her she had a sad look. Oh great, I should have seen this conversation coming up.

"How's your hand?", she said, sitting down in a seat across from me.

"It's fine, should heal without any scarring", I said, flexing my fingers to show it was fine. After that there was silence between the two of us. Silence I welcomed.

"What did you mean about putting your parents' murderer in a coma?". Guess we're having this conversation. She's lucky I'm tired or I would probably argue against this talk. Then again I think tired is all I've been as of late.

"My parents were killed while I was sleeping over at a friend's house. That night a man broke into the house for unknown reasons. That man was Joseph "Hammerhead" Harrow, my father heard a ruckus in the kitchen and went to investigate not knowing it would cost him his life and my mothers. Even though they had enough evidence to put him at the scene the chargers never stuck because of a bullshit alibi and faked video evidence putting him there. After that I started to change from my old self. Moved in with my Aunt May where she took care of me but the anger toward the man never left but only got worse. Started pushing people away and became a delinquent acting out to deal with my anger. Things changed once I was bitten by the spider. I saw it as a way to get revenge when my powers came in so I did. Found out where he was after tearing the underworld of New York apart and beat him within an inch of his life"

"Why'd you stop?"

"Can't say, to this day I still wonder to myself why I didn't kill him. Just remember my hand raised about to deal the final blow that would kill him but stopped. Even with all my will I couldn't throw the punch. So I left him there bloody and beaten once I heard the police sirens. Turns out he was put into a coma with no telling if he would wake up again", I said remembering the moment very clearly.

"Jack, I think the reason you couldn't kill him is because your not a killer"

"Doesn't change that I'm not a good person. I'm selfish, have anger management problems, don't care about others' well being, and lack a sense of justice and empathy. Hell, basically left this dimension Peter to die to prove my earlier comment. Not sure what I'm doing anyway trying to do the right thing. Can't even teach miles a useful thing so what makes me think I can do the right thing for once"

"What were you like before?", Gwen asked, ignoring what I said.

"Used to be a social butterfly, many would tell you I could make a friend in a second. At the same time I loved doing new things and was adventurous. Used to also care a lot about others too, there was a moment during my childhood when a kid was being picked on in preschool. Took on three bullies that day in a fist fight. Ended up with some bruises but the three bullies were way worse than me at the end", I said letting out a genuine laugh and getting one from Gwen too. I can't remember the last time I laughed like this.

"Now though, I used to not really care what happens to others. Using the excuse "it's not my business" to justify it. I've become numb to life that's until I ended up here. Emotions I haven't felt in so long I'm starting to feel again and truthfully it scares me. I thought of it like an iceberg melting but this one will never truly be melted. Life's left it's scar on me"