I haven't yet gotten used to the idea of sleeping alone. As it turns out, it's a lot harder than I thought.
I know he struggles to sleep and I was almost seconds away from telling him to just sleep in here, but then I thought it might be weird, and he needs space. So I'm giving him space.
I hate space. I hate it. It's quiet and it's lonely and I feel- weird.
I was just sat here, blurry eyed and tried. I thought maybe if I cried then I'd get something out of it.
But I'm incapable of crying which is odd.
I guess my mum really got her moneys worth, now I'm going insane.
Going? My god.
I thought maybe if I stopped doing everything I do then he'd magically appear knowing I'm a changed man. But he hasn't yet.
I feel like I've changed quite a lot since he told me he wanted space 29 hours ago.
"Oh my god you're fucking insane." I've come to terms with talking to myself. I've locked myself in my room so really I can only be judged by me. "Louis!" And Niall.
"Louis! Open the door!" Trudging my way to the door I unlock it, watching him stand there with the same panicked look on his face that he has 70 percent of the time. "Yes?"
"Harry's missing." I nod. "He went for a walk." He's an early bird apparently, that's what he says anyway. I think it's weird to give yourself that title but to each there own I guess.
"No, Louis he's missing. He usually leaves a note and says hey I'm walking I'll be back and then he goes. His bedroom door was pried open and his bed is a mess. Someone's taken him, he's gone."
"Nobody took him, I need you to call whoever you can and tell them to keep an eye out for him, do not touch him, do not talk to him and do not try and help him. You will die."
"What? Louis is he okay?" I wasn't even sure, I was just guessing. "Yeah." Good guess? I say it is. "You're guessing."
"I am yes. I think it is a good guess. Okay just- try and stay positive or- whatever. I don't know, keep a positive mind set. He's doing great, he's running through flower fields- I can't fucking get my jacket on."
"Hey, breath," Zayn holds his hands over my shoulders. "Just, breath. Everything's going to be fine. You're okay, he's okay. Stay calm."
"What if he's not okay? Z I can't have that on my conscience knowing I watched him leave." He kisses my cheek. "Stay calm. You'll find him, you always do."
"Yeah." I start to make my way towards the car, trying to match my breathing to my fucking heartbeat because it was so out of time that it might as well have separate uses.
Is your heart supposed to hurt this much? Cause it does.
Ni-
Says he's somewhere near the old high school. The one where Nelly went.
Little fucker took his tracker out, rightfully so yes but now he's missing and I'm having a heart attack.
I think. I don't know. It feels that way.
This is minor. I mean I'm sure worse things have happened, it just feels like this is the worst thing to happen. "Come on Harry, please don't be in there."
The door was jammed open. "Harry!" I could hear the little fucker talking to himself. "Do not go in there. You touch him I'll fucking kill you. Thank you for finding him, but he's fine."
I start to pick up my pace. "Harry!" I really hoped he didn't see it, but he was stood exactly where I'd done it. "You don't know anything," he starts laughing. "Shut up she's dead, Leah is dead."
He starts to pace. "You're not dead are you? You're alive? You're okay? Yeah? You can see your kids. Of course you can, everything is fine, everybody is fine."
I'd always thought it was Nelly he was talking to. "No, no- I killed her? I didn't, no. Please don't make me, I'm sorry- I'm sorry, I didn't mean too. Please, please I didn't mean to."
He gasps. "Be quiet, you're being loud. I don't want to be found. You have to be quiet." He covers over his ears.
"No you're gone, you're gone and you're breathing and your kids are fine and I didn't- I didn't do anything wrong. Please, please you're okay. Everything is fine."
"Harry." He shakes his head. "No I just got rid of you. Get out of my head I said I was sorry. I'm sorry I'm sorry."
"Harry." He throws his hands behind his back, turning far too fast. His eyes were blood red it was scary. "You're not in my head?" Stepping closer I watch his eyes go wide for a split second. "You are in my head."
He holds the blade to my throat. "See usually I'd just fucking kill you for this but you're a little funky in the head so I think I'll let it pass. Harry everything is fine."
"Get out of my head, I just got you out I can't do this. I can't have you in my life Louis I don't- I can't kill you. I can't. Get the fuck out of my head."
"Harry I'm not in your head," The knife drives it's way through my side. "My god am I glad I sharpened that yesterday, could've been worse."
"You ruined her painting." He grabs my neck twisting the knife. "I'm sorry, please you have to believe me. I'm sorry. I tried to fix it. I'm so sorry Harry."
"You ruined her painting!" His nails dig into my neck. "Harry please. I'm sorry. Please listen to me. I need you to wake up, I need you to be here, with me. lease wake up, please listen to me. Harry please."
"You ruined it." I'd given in, it wasn't like I deserved anything less. "I'm sorry Harry." I brush my thumb under his chin.
Something switched, his drops both his hands and I take in a struggled breath. "I'm sorry."
"Harry please don't apologise. I've been waiting for somebody- praying for somebody to do that. Harry I'm so sorry. You have to believe me I really- I- I didn't mean-"
"Hey, hey no you're okay. I got you." I fall into his chest. "I'm sorry."
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Love&Affection | Larry Stylinson
Fiksi Penggemar"He's dead." Harry whispered. "That's the idea." "He's dead." He repeats. "I mean his eyes are separate from his sockets and his spleen is somewhere mixed in with his teeth. So yes." "You killed him!" He points. "Don't point what if he's shy." "Oh...
