Hesitation 18+🔞

Chapter 29: Answers

The lobby goes silent as your comrades look to one another in defeat, before Armin speaks up.

"I have. She didn't have much to say."

"Hmm." You turn yourself around and carefully walk back towards the women's dorms, leaving your comrades to murmur behind you. The situation with Historia is tricky to navigate, she's lost the person closest to her and the story you've been told about her identity doesn't really make much sense. While it's confusing, you never really considered her story, being too wrapped up in your own. Once you arrive at her door, you gently knock and let her know it's you. You give her about a minute, and without an answer, you try knocking once more.

"Historia, it's (Y/N). Do you have a minute?"

Still, no answer. Mikasa walks near you and tries to open the door, but it's locked.

"Are we sure she's in there?" You ask her.

"I don't know." She says, eyeing the door frame.

You glance down the hall where Armin meets your eye, he looks like he's holding in a lot. Maintaining eye contact, you walk towards his direction as you approach the lobby.

"When was the last time you spoke to her?"

Armin tenses up in his seat, hesitant to answer your question. It's as if he's hiding something, but why? Why would he have any reason to keep information from you, and possibly the others? Is there something that everyone seems to know, that you don't?
You take your eyes off of him and look to the others, trying to read their expressions, but they all look just as confused as you are, intently observing Armin for any indication his body language might betray.

"She's just... not well. She needs time, (Y/N). Everyone grieves differently, if I knew anything else, I wouldn't keep it from you guys. The last time we spoke was last night, I ran into her in the kitchen before bed. She didn't say much, she's not her usual self by any means. I wish I could help her, I just don't know how."

You consider his words and plop down on the couch next to Jean and let out a dejected sigh, sinking further into the cushion. You struggle to find a solution and the group sits in silence before Eren resumes conversation.

"Is... Conny still with Hange?"

So that explains why Levi handled the situation earlier.

"Yeah.. Hange wanted to return to Ragako with him to investigate his claims. He thinks... he thinks his mother is a Titan."
Sasha adds

"Well, we know that's where the invasion had initially started, it's possible that, this entire time, we've been fighting humans. Humans that have somehow turned to titans." Armin continued.

You look up and stare at the ceiling, listening to the others, and while everyone is surprised at this news, you aren't. It somehow made sense that all titans started out as humans. You don't understand why you feel this isn't a groundbreaking discovery, it should bother you. After discovering that people can shift into Titans, like Eren and Ymir, this only makes sense. There's still so much that we don't know about the Titans, there's so much that it's difficult to even attempt to figure out. The overwhelming thought of how much more there is to the world turns you off completely, you don't want to begin to unravel it. Noah would be a better participant in this conversation, he could come up with 1000 theories within a second, but you dismiss it all. It's too much effort to come up with a why, it's easier to just accept that nobody really knows the whole truth instead of torturing yourself to find a reason. All you've been faced with lately are unanswered questions, it's getting harder to ponder those questions, so you just push them away, accepting that you don't have the answers. It's all you can do.