Hesitation 18+🔞

Chapter 61: Shiganshina on our Shoulders

As the others head back to the main building, Levi eyes the two of you down before speaking

"Today's training was to test your leadership skills, I need a second in command per Erwin. Before I make my decision, how do either of you feel about the responsibility that comes with that?"

Truly, you weren't expecting this whatsoever.

"Could you die if you were ordered to do so?"

Jean's eyes instantly widen, you can almost hear his pulse as the vein in his neck begins to ever so slightly twitch at the notion. You look to Levi, meeting his stern expression with bored eyes before you respond

"Sure" your tone was lacklustre, just as Jeans voice firmly confirms he, too, would die per Levi's command.

Levi's eyes narrow at you, and you both hold each others gaze just a second longer than anticipated, before he nods his head at you.

"(L/N), come with me. Kirstein, you're dismissed."

You can almost hear his sigh of relief before returning to HQ, closely following Levi. Once you arrive, he hands his horse off to Sasha, she being the only one he trusts with his horse. Armin gently takes Mara from you as you walk next to Levi despite his quickened pace.

"Im sure Erwin will be pleased with this decision for the upcoming expedition.."
Levi's tone softens as he ascended the stairs

"That's right.. one month left..."

"With a heavy sigh, he said, "The coming weekend... I'd appreciate if you managed to keep yourself out of trouble.. I'll be leaving to help Historia's philanthropy mission with the MP underground."

"Aw, so no invite?"

Your poor attempt at a joke was overlooked, Levi remained unamused at your nonchalant attitude regarding the situation. Nonetheless, he had grown accustomed to your unique coping mechanisms.

You've been distancing yourself from the others after Gwen, progressively isolating yourself from your comrades. Immersing yourself in rigorous training, you started refusing any indications to socialize, all in a bid to keep yourself occupied.

The days of the week seemed to go by in a blur, each day marked by grueling training sessions, pushing the boundaries of your physical abilities. Avoiding Noah was a task you'd initially presumed to be daunting, but it appeared he was preoccupied with Hange and Moblit. Your interactions had been limited to brief exchanges following the morning lectures, where you managed to convince him of your wellbeing, even when you were feeling the exact opposite. Noah stood by the isle, his voice brimming with pride as he expressed how proud he was of you for earning the title of Squad Levi's 2nd in command, bragging to his comrades about you.
As the lecture concluded and you're on your way out, you are waved down by Noah, enveloped in a conversation with Floch. The red haired boy looked up at you with guilty eyes, a silent plea for understanding before Noah jumped in to spare the boy from explaining.

"As you know, Floch came from the Garrison and had worked with Gwen." Noah began, his words imbued with a gravity that demanded your attention. "He wasn't sure when, if at all, would be an appropriate time to mention some of their last conversations together, but they proved to be significant."

Floch chimed in hastily, his words tumbling out in a rush
"As the Captains second, I hesitated to burden you with information unrelated to the mission."

Attempting to provide a sense of levity you quipped.
"Am I truly so daunting? Surely my presence isn't as imposing as the captain's." Yet, your jest fell flat, met with two pairs of solemn eyes.