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From the very beginning, It was always kooks and pouges. The two main problems that made all of our lives a living hell, and the only reason why were in this illogical and still jaw-dropping predicament. Pouges attempting to prove that we deserve better and that we are better than the kooks, whether it was financial or not.
There were some people with everything. Which was a fantasy in our eyes, and a behavior that we five pouges wanted to tackle for the longest time at the beginning of our dangerous story and declining reputation.
And some with nothing. Our current nightmare, but some pouges had it worse than others. For example, the difference between JJ and I. Not much to be said or thought, but there was a big difference in our lives that I never wanted to take for granted due to the terrible and tough situations in his life.
That's the way it's always been.
Nevertheless, he always wished to be in my cute little shoes. I always saw it in his luminous ocean eyes I deeply fell for. He wanted to be enough. More than enough. Overflowing with enough. He didn't want to be JJ, anymore. Because he felt like it was a waste of space, and a waste of time because according to him, "He doesn't feel like he's going to make it in life." But I wasn't going to lose hope on my boyfriend, I was never going to.
What JJ dreamed of was two loving and hard-working parents who fought for everything they had. Two loving siblings, a delightful and happy home, incredible and adoring friends, optimistic energy, exceptionally bubbly, and constantly carrying a sweet and tight-lipped smile. Just like what I was known for. Which was why I was always approachable to everyone on the island. I was apparently a good girl. Which always made JJ chuckle because they didn't know who I was behind the curtain, or in other words inside the chateau. Life of the party, always getting crazy drunk, losing my mind off of the highs, a long joint in between my soft and slim fingers. But to him, I was a good girl.
A good girl who deserved better and needed to get far away from him to succeed in life. He was guilty, I always saw it. He rubbed off on me without meaning to when we grew up. He was exposed to more explicit stuff when he was growing up, and without realizing it, he let me in on those moments, didn't realize it could ruin me, and my reputation, but I didn't care. Because it didn't ruin me. It ruined the false and stupid act of me being nice and taking everyone's shit. And it brought off the better side of me. We all knew the good girl act was soon going to disappear in a matter of time, and I'm glad it did. It was dead. I'm not willing to be walking on eggshells around everyone because ostensibly I follow rules and I was a sweet girl. An innocent girl who could be easily fooled.
