House Of Cards

11: Back again

The pain of separation plagued her day and night. She missed him to the point she would wake up in anguish, sobbing her eyes out due to nightmares. Even though it had just been over a week since she moved to Seoul, the fear that he might have found somebody hunted her. Whenever she called him, the disinterest in his voice was evident. To make matters worst, he would rarely respond to her text in time, often taking hours or leaving her in read.

She knew she had to move on, maybe the separation was a good thing but every time such thoughts sprouted, her heart revolted against her mind. It was stuck in the belief that he was her soulmate.

Despite the heartache caused by their separation, the cherished memories they shared became her unwavering resolve to hold onto him. His mischievous grin, his resonant voice, his sun-kissed complexion, and his eyes that outshone the stars were carved deep within her heart. And so, when an opportunity arose to retrieve a document for her internship, she eagerly booked a ticket to return to Dageu, brimming with anticipation. Crossing her finger in the hope that her absence knocked some senses in his head, she texted him about her arrival. Different scenarios played in her mind among them was him confessing that he still loved her and wanted her back. Her heart fluttered and she prayed desperately for it to come true.

As she was on the train, she got his response informing her he was preparing dinner for her however he had planned to go on a trip with a colleague so wouldn't be there for the weekend. Her heart instantly plummeted.

"No this can't be happening," she thought to herself

Her mind screamed, and her heart thrashed

Suddenly air went thick and she should hardly take in a proper breath.

In just two hours, she made her way back to Daegu, fueled by a sense of urgency. As she arrived, she sprinted towards his apartment with the speed of a lightning bolt. Pressing the doorbell, she anxiously waited for him to open the door, bursting with questions ready to spill from her lips.

The moment she entered his apartment she blurted out.

"So where will you be going?" she tried her best not to sound invasive

"I was planning jeju" he appeared a bit more anxious than usual as he replied

Placing her bags on the floor she pretended to be composed as she causally threw another question.

"This colleague of yours, he is in the same department?"

"She is"

The punch that landed on her heart was so harsh, she was speechless for a moment.

"It isn't what you are thinking, it is just a trip. She is my senior, she helped me a lot to adapt to the new company and she is thirty-six, and has a daughter who is fourteen"

His words were supposed to calm her down but they didnt. She felt even more anxious because she knew him well. He had a history of getting involved with older women regardless of their marital status. She was the only woman he dated that was younger than himself. His type had always been mature, bold and outgoing, someone who was in control of their life, words he repeated hundreds of times, something he kept asking her to be.

"Were you planning to sleep with her, you can tell me, I can at least prepare myself" She almost choked as she blurted out those words when he hurriedly took her hands and spoke.

"No silly," Her breathing hitched.

"I admit I did flirt with her, don't know what came to my mind but when I found out you were coming back, I felt this intense fear. Though we are broken up, I felt scared, as if I did something wrong. I truly felt maybe we should try to work this out. I don't want us to break up like this." She couldn't believe her ears as her heart thumped in happiness.

It was like a dream come true.

No, it was a dream come true.

He wanted her back

She wanted to jump and screen in happiness

"We are a great team, Saya. What we have isn't something that can be easily found. You are someone that accepted me. I really don't think this is how we should break up. This isn't the right way to end our relationship"

Her smile instantly flattered listening to the last line.

"Taehyung, what does that even mean?" Her voice came out harder than she intended

"I want to hear you say you love me so you want to be with me not that we didnt break up right so you want me back" She retracted her hands back from his grasp.

"It sounds like, you want to be with me so that next time you can end it in the right way, this sounds stupid" She didnt hesitate to scorn the choice of his words.

"Tell me you love me, you want me back because you want a future with me" she demanded but her demand was met with a swift no.

"You know the future is uncertain, moreover after our master's is done we don't know where our life will take us"

"Then what do you mean by let's get back together?" she nearly scoffed. This wasn't what she prayed for. It was a twisted version of what her heart desired.

"Let's stick together until we can, let's be with each other until time permits, and let's help each other succeed" his voice was persuasive as he held her and pulled her close.

She closed her eyes because now more than happiness it was fear that had hold on her. Would she be strong enough to go through it again? Could she really trust that he wouldn't break her again?

This is a bad idea, her mind screamed and begged. The warning ring rang but her heart convinced her that he cared for her too much, he wouldn't act cruel to her.

He loved her

"I do love you, Saya" The moment those words escaped his lips, she was back to square one. She held him tight and kiss his sweet lips and all the fears and doubts disappeared.