Secrets and Sins

Chapter 6

~Beatrice~

It was a rough night. Ava woke several times, clutching at the sister warrior, but wasn’t coherent, she mumbled strings of gibberish, tossing and turning. Beatrice carefully dabbed her forehead with a wet cloth hoping to cool the Halo bearer’s raging fever.

At 2am, Ava’s fever broke. Beatrice felt immense relief as Ava’s body relaxed and her breathing steadied. Hopefully they were through the worst of it.

~Ava~


Ava stirred when sunlight hit her face, she felt like she had been hit by a truck. Everything ached. She was lying on her back in the old double bed, the sheets felt cold and damp.

Sweated up a storm. Gross.

Ava slowly turned her head to look around the room, her head spinning a little. She shut her eyes for a moment trying not to be sick. When the nausea passed, Ava opened her eyes again. The sun was close to the center of the sky, so she had been asleep for over half a day. The bedroom was very tidy, a couple of Bea’s personal items neatly placed on the shelving and dresser. Ava wondered how long the other woman had been here since she was gone.

Speaking of Bea, where is she?

Ava tried to call out, but all that came out was a croak. Bea somehow must’ve heard her and poked her head around the door frame.

“Oh hey, you're awake.” Bea said, smiling sweetly. She was dressed in a grey tank top and track pants. Ava loved it when she dressed in comfy clothes and couldn't complain when those toned arms were on display. The sister warrior approached and sat down next to her on the bed.

“How do you feel?”

“Just fantastic.” Ava croaked out sarcastically.

Bea gave her a sympathetic look and handed her a small open water bottle.

“Thanks.” Ava said greedily gulping down the contents. “Fuck that’s so much better.”

“Language.” Bea replied, trying to keep the grin off her face.

Bea got up and retrieved something from the bedside table. Ava saw the syringe attached to a ridiculously big needle in her hand and started shaking her head.

That’s a nope.

Bea sighed, “Come on Ava, it has to be done. You won’t get better otherwise.”

“NO.” Ava pulled the blankets up to her chin.

“Please? For me?” Bea shooting her the biggest guilt tripping puppy dog eyes Ava had ever seen.

Ava groaned, “Fine. But for the record using those puppy dog eyes is playing dirty.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

~Beatrice~

Beatrice made Ava some toast which the Halo bearer picked at, her appetite hadn’t returned yet, which was really not that surprising after everything. The younger woman’s complexion was much healthier if still a little pale. Ava’s eyes were clear and bright after looking so dull and lifeless yesterday. Beatrice felt some of the weight that had been crushing her chest lift at the Halo bearer’s improvement.

Ava caught her staring.

“What?”

“Nothing, you just look way better than you did yesterday.” Beatrice replied, looking away.

“Well, I bet I looked pretty hot yesterday.” Ava waggled her eyebrows.

Beatrice groaned, “That was truly terrible. Maybe one of your worst.”

“You love it.”

Beatrice flushed, she remembered what Camilla had asked last night, she supposed she should talk with Ava about the goodbye at the ark and about the kiss they had shared. But the thought of bringing it up terrified her.

Beatrice wasn’t good at things like this, to be fair it wasn’t like she had really had an opportunity to practice. She had been shipped off to boarding school before really having a chance to have any proper relationships.
Ava took her hand, pulling Beatrice back to reality.

“Hey, you good?” She asked Beatrice, searching her face.

“Yeah, it’s just. Um…” Beatrice took a deep breath, composing herself, Ava waited patiently.
“Do you remember before you went through the portal? What you said to me?” Unable to keep eye contact, Beatrice instead busied herself with tracing the tendons in the back of Ava’s hand.

“Of course I do.” Came Ava’s gentle reply. “Bea look at me.”

When the sister warrior didn’t, couldn’t comply, Ava tilted Beatrice’s chin up with her free hand. Her breath caught, Ava was looking at her with such adoration and love, Beatrice couldn’t help the single tear that escaped her. Ava wiped it away delicately with her thumb.

“I said I love you. I still do Bea. I love you. I have for a long time now.”

Beatrice was speechless. Actually hearing it from Ava now, without the threat of imminent death hanging over her was stupefying. She could scarcely believe it.

“But why?” Beatrice hated how insecure her voice sounded. She couldn't help herself, of course she loved Ava. She loved Ava more than life itself, but Beatrice couldn’t fathom how a woman as incredible as Ava could love her back.

“Why?” Ava’s voice cracked, like her heart was breaking for Beatrice.

~Ava~

Ava couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Did Bea really not value herself at all? Ava could see more tears welling up in the sister warrior's deep brown eyes. Ava squeezed the hand she was holding and took a deep breath. She needed to get this out without dissolving into her own tears, Bea needed to hear it.

“Bea, where do I even start? You are the most amazing person I’ve ever met. You are so kind and gentle, but also the most ferocious warrior when you have to be. You are fiercely intelligent; you love and protect your friends with your whole heart. Even when they annoy the shit out of you.” Bea let out a watery chuckle at that.

“You're an absolute badass fighter, I mean seriously, I feel sorry for anyone that crosses you.”

“And I mean look at you, how can I not be attracted to you. You’re like smoking hot.”

Bea scoffed, blushing a little.

“But mostly I love you because you are just so, so beautiful inside and out. I’ve never felt like this about anyone else Bea. It scares me sometimes, but I know it’s all worth it, even to just be near you.” Ava finished.

Ava waited while Bea processed what she had told her. A myriad of emotions flickering across her tear-stained face. Ava stroked Bea’s hand with her thumb in slow comforting circles and waited some more. She would wait forever for the woman in front of her if she had to.

Bea seemed to come to a decision, her expression smoothing into one of serious determination. Ava raised an eyebrow questioningly. Bea surged forward and captured her lips with her own. Ava, caught by surprise, froze for a second before kissing her back whole heartedly, humming happily. Ava moved her free hand back to Bea’s cheek tilting her head slightly so she could deepen the kiss, Bea gasped against her lips pressing forwards a little too much. Ava winced, her abdomen twinging sharply.

“Oh God, sorry.” Bea panted. Ava preened a little at how out of breath Bea sounded.

“It’s okay, it’s okay. Just probably gonna have to wait a bit to do that kind of stuff.” Ava giggled with a wink, laughing harder when Bea blushed crimson.

“So we’re okay? And we…ah…love each other?” Ava checked in.

“Yes Ava, I love you.” Bea said, trying to look exasperated, but struggling to contain her smile.

“Yay!”