Here's a little Tuesday 420 special because why the fuck not hey?
Male reader
"This taco is so good" I groan, taking another bite and swallowing it before taking a hit of the joint wade passes me.
I sigh in content, feeling the drug blur my mind. I hit the J again and bite the taco, finishing it and reaching for another.
I pass the end of the joint back to Wade and he finishes it off, flicking the butt elsewhere and taking a massive bite of his own taco.
He moans at the taste and I see abit of red sauce under his lip.
I giggle as him, "you look like a vampire" I point out, he squint his eyes at me before running to a different room and comming back out with a pointed collar vampire cape.
"Blah bluh blah, I will drink your blood" he puts on a horrible Dracula impression and covers half of his face with the Cape.
I light up another joint and take a long drag, snorting at wade when he trips over the end of the Cape trying to sit back down.
I turn to the table where our big pile of tacos once lay, seeing only one left. I catch wade in the corner of my eye also eyeing the delicious treat.
We both lunge for it, reaching out and grabbing one end of it each, pulling on it gently to not hurt the poor little thing.
"Its mine" I yell at the merc.
"I paid for it" he retorts.
"With the money I paid you with to kill my neighbour" I shout back.
I tug on the taco one more time before hearing a crunch, snap and a slop. Both wade and I slowly look down to our hands, seeing half of a taco with hardly any filling. We look down to the ground and see a big pile of meat on the floor.
"YOU BROKE IT" wade shouts, tackling me to the couch and hitting me with a pillow he picked up.
"NO YOU BROKE IT" I yell back, trying to sheild my face with my arms.
"YOU BROKE THE FUCKING TACO, YOU DROPPED IT, ITS GONE" He screams at me, hitting me harder eith the pillow.
"I DIDNT DO SH-" I cut myself off, holding a hand over my mouth and the other on wades chest, pushing him back.
"Oh no- you better not-"
I suddenly, violently and disgustingly throw up onto wade, it splashes over his deadpool suit and onto his face.
We both freeze, looking at one another.
Wade stand up, raising his arms above his head, "I WIN. YOU GREENED I WIN" he shouts.
I groan and pull my wallet out of my back pocket, handing the man a 100 dollar bill and rolling my eyes.
"You suck. Round 2?" I grin at him.
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Marvel Oneshots
Fanfictionhi. so thisll be whatever you request i guess. like, it can be the actors, other characters they played. what you want them to do in the oneshot. Have fun reading Also yes, some chapters will have smut (99.9% of chapters have smut) I STARTED THIS WH...
