The Heart That's Meant to Love You [COMPLETED]

Chapter 72: Eye-Opener

"She asked about you today," Donovan told Kieran in a tone so matter-of-fact that it might have been about any boring subject.

Kieran knew better, because he knew exactly to which woman Donovan referred. Not Tawny. Not even Naomi. But, rather, the woman that paid Donovan's salary. The woman that they so carefully avoided chatting about, lest it ruin their friendship.

For Donovan to have brought it up, there must be some ulterior motive or more important subtext.

Kieran shoved his hands in his pockets as he weighed his options. He hadn't yet calmed down from Annoying Oliver's party. That was part of the reason he and Donovan were walking and not driving. So that Kieran could cool the anger he had accumulated over the last two hours. Talking about that woman might rile him up more. On the other hand, perhaps he needed to get it out in the open. If he could resolve one thing tonight, Kieran might be able to sleep.

"What is it this time?" Kieran finally conceded.

Donovan shrugged his shoulders. "She asked how you were doing. Says she misses you and wants you to come back."

"I told her a long time ago, I'm not going back to her."

Kieran stood firmly by that decision. Patrick was enough of a hassle. He didn't need to add on to the burden by looking back at the life he used to have.

"It won't stop her from hoping," Donovan pointed out.

Kieran wrinkled his nose at the teaching tone that Donovan used. "What? Did she tell you to send me back no matter what?"

"She knows better." Donovan leaned closer, lowering his voice conspiratorially. "At least she's not manipulating you like Patrick and Tawny."

"First of all, Tawny isn't manipulating me. I owe her a lot."

"And that makes emotional blackmail okay?" Donovan arched his brows. "That's news to me."

"Since when do you talk so much?" Kieran snapped.

In response, Donovan shrugged his shoulders again. Funny.

The thing was, Donovan had a point. Kieran just refused to believe it.

Tawny had always been a sweet girl, ever since he met her in their freshman year of high school. Kieran hadn't known better back then, and he had been the reason for Tawny's ruin. If he could use her attachment to him to put her back on the right track, he would do it. It was his responsibility, after all. Her problems were his fault.

Yet, a small part of Kieran wanted Tawny's problems to be her own fault. If Tawny's problems were her fault, he could chase what made him happy. For that, he felt even more guilt.

How dare he try to be happy when Tawny might never be happy at all?

Donovan smacked a palm against the side of Kieran's head. "Overthinking."

"Getting pushy," Kieran threw back.

Donovan pulled his black baseball cap lower over his face, a clear sign that he was grinning and wanted to obscure it in the darkness. The jerk had clearly done it on purpose.

Kieran refocused on the original subject instead of pushing the issue. "Why does she want me back this time? Business?"

Donovan shook his head. "She knows you won't help with the business side of things."

"Then why does she so desperately want me to come back?"

"Genuine concern?"

Kieran could honestly say that possibility had never crossed his mind. For years, she had been trying to coax him into staying. For years, Kieran had been running away because he didn't want to do what she asked. So, genuine concern? Was that even possible, coming from her?

Donovan kicked at a stone in the path. "She's your mom, Kieran."

"That's at least second in her priority list and you know it."

"Doesn't mean she can't decide that she just wants to see her son, no ulterior motives."

"I prefer it when you don't talk," Kieran grumbled.

When Donovan got talkative, he made logical points about life. Kieran didn't want the logic. He didn't want his bubble to burst. So far, Kieran thought he had everything figured out. When wise Donovan began to speak, Kieran started to second guess himself.

What if everything he had figured out was a lie he told himself? What if Donovan was right and Tawny emotionally blackmailed Kieran into the man he was today? What if things could be better, but Kieran refused to be good enough for better?

If Donovan was right, Kieran could change his own life. Kieran had spent too long telling himself that he could never change the inevitable. Did Donovan have a better point?

"I'm just saying," Donovan continued, "go back for an hour. It's just dinner. Leave if she brings up anything you don't want to talk about."

"Which is everything."

"Oh, come on. Live a little for once. Take control of your life. Or are you too chicken?"

Kieran didn't want to think about any of it. He didn't want to be wrong.

Yet, a glimmering piece of hope on the inside of him desperately wished Donovan was right.

Kieran shoved it down before it could glow any brighter. "Let's grab some snacks," he suggested instead.

Because eating emotionally never had any downfalls.

As usual, Donovan didn't argue about Kieran's desire for snacks. Donovan was there for protection, moral support, and the occasional good idea. Since he had said his piece, he would probably be silent for the rest of the night.

Which left Kieran to wonder. If he made the first move toward bettering his life, would he be able to accomplish anything he wanted? Or would it all crumble around him like glass shattered in the wind?

Maybe, for a minute, it was worth mulling over.