Hunger

CHAPTER 17

Jacob never woke up.

He stayed in a coma.

My physical pain disappeared overtime, but the "soul" pain stayed, burning bright. It did go away fractionally whenever I was with Jacob, which was all the time, but it never fully disappeared.

I read Jake books.

I let him listen to my MP3 player.

I talked with him about things I saw on CNN.

Mom practically drug me out of Jacob's room one day and sat with me in Dad's old room/my new study.

"When can I see him?" I pouted.

"When you're done your homework and slept."

"I have slept."

"Sleeping in an uncomfortable chair beside Jacob's bed is not sleeping. It's resting."

"Well I wouldn't have to if I hadn't gone to Jacob's house, leading the werewolves there."

"Hey," Mom frowned. "Don't blame yourself. It's my fault. I overreacted and kept you away from him. What you did was what I would've done if it was Dad and I."

I didn't like my mom taking the blame for my mistake. "What happened to the wolves?"

Mom turned away. "They're taken care of."

"Oh."

"The strange thing is, they can't find Sam. He's just...gone." Mom frowned, walking to the stereo in the corner and looking at the CD rack beside it.

"Gone? But what about his pack?"

"We don't know. Both packs are in chaos, because of one Alpha is in a coma and the other just disappeared. That's why were' going in big groups to hunt. Just in case."

I heard her open a CD case and put it in the stereo, pressing "PLAY" when it was ready.

I smiled at the song. "You're tastes in music are changing."

"More like broadening." She grinned. "I have more than enough time now."

I nodded. "Are things okay with you and Grandpa now?"

"Yes," she sighed. "I apologized about being out of line when you were...they forgave me."

"Good. I hated you guys fighting."

"Well I'm glad Edward was here when you were grounded, talking them down. If he wasn't I don't think they would have had the reaction they did." She frowned.

I finished the equation I was on and shut my book. "Ok," I sighed. "Done. Can I at least see Jacob before I go to bed?"

She shook her head. "Carlisle is going to reset his bones tonight. You can see him in the morning."

I pouted.

Mom kissed my forehead and cupped my cheek in her hand. "I know sweetie. But I promise the second you wake up, you may go see him"

"You know," I whispered, looking down sadly. "Jacob and I haven't even had our first kiss yet. How messed up is that?"

I heard Mom suck in a short breath then sigh deeply. "You are only six and a half."

"It's just weird. There is no one else for me but him. You'd think we'd express our love physically, but it's not like that." I said. Love was such a weird word to use about Jacob. The affection went much deeper than the word love.

"What brought all this on?" Mom asked softly after awhile of thinking.

"I'm trying to remember his touch on my cheek or his bear hugs or his beautifully irresistible voice. Then I realized I have never been kissed. Of course Jacob used to kiss my forehead, but that's not very passionate."

Mom smiled as I looked up at her. "All Jacob is, is passionate around you."

"If Jacob..." I broke off. "I'll never be able to experience it."

Moms hugged me and after awhile she said, "Let's get you to bed."

She picked me up like she used to do when I was little and set me in the comfortable bed Grandma had set up for me or Jacob.

Mom covered me in a silk comforter and snuggled in beside me, stroking me hair.

I slowly drifted off to the song "Lost" on the Coldplay CD.

I dreamt of Jacob all night, as usual.