tw: racism, colorism
im mixed. im west asian, and white, but I never flame the white part of me because I have no connection to it besides my biology. i have no connection to the culture or anything else. my white side of the family can't seem to accept the fact that im asian though. they never liked my mother because she was radical, progressive, and pro-inclusivity. but also because she's arab. (arabs are from west asia and north africa. i am not african) they always point out my olive skin tone saying "you need to wash better. you are all brown" as if I AM NOT A BROWN PERSON. I am not super dark, but I have social anxiety and stay in a lot, but I still have almond eyes and a very recognizable arab skin tone. they used to make fun of me for making cultural foods with my mom. I would be running around with a plate of dolmas (my favorite food EVER) and my family would go "I don't understand why you are trying to hold on to that. you aren't even arab" (they pronounce it like "aye rabb" which is VERY offensive) they make fun of our family heirlooms and mocked arabic in front of me. they saw the lebanese table we have that has arabic calligraphy on it and they laughed at it. i cant stand them. they make me want to die. i don't want to let go of my culture or my ethnic trusts, but if I don't, they will literally hate me. they told me to cake on pale foundation and use tape to open my eyes more. i cry all the time because my family hates me for my race and culture. i wish they would just love my skin the way I do. they are my family.
im sorry for making anyone who read this read it. I just can't with my family.
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my TMF book
Fanfictionwill do: headcanons, mini stories about existing characters and implied characters (ex. Zander's dad, Sean's parents, ect.), anything about the music club, my opinions, ships will not do: Jake's "friends" (they make me uncomfortable), toxic hc's (r...
